There’s A Company Selling A Jacuzzi Just For Your Balls, Fellas

I’m a lady who exclusively dates other ladies, so I don’t know very much about what goes on in a gent’s nether regions. I do imagine things get a bit sweaty and rather unsavory smelling with your junk pressed up against your body in jeans/pants all day, which is why Testicuzzi—that’s right, a jacuzzi made specifically for men’s balls—was created.

Scroll down to find out more about the product and see photos of the crazy design.

  1. No, Testicuzzi isn’t a gag gift. If you think a mini jacuzzi with ball-shaped dents in it is a joke gift that you’d buy in Spencer’s Gifts (am I dating myself here? Do these shops still exist?) at your local mall, think again. The creators of Testicuzzi swear this is a real thing made for real use. “This is not a gag gift, it is an actual product, but if you want to buy it for a friend we’ll let you call it a gag gift for men,” their website reads.
  2. It may have started as a joke, but these guys actually followed through on it. The website offers an explanation for how this product actually came to be made and sold after “a funny conversation between friends” that quickly turned serious. “The Testicuzzi was conceived in a conversation about Dating, Drinking and Random Trends. As many of those [conversations] go, we decided to take what ultimately was funny conversation and turn it into reality,” the inventors explained.
  3. They used 3D printing to get it just right. The Testicuzzi didn’t come out perfect the first time around. No, it took several rounds of prototypes made using 3D printers until they were sure the design, size, and proportions were just right.
  4. Guys like to be pampered too. As the Testicuzzi website explains, “The Testicuzzi features an ultra-soft pre-cast silicone pillow to rest your largest member on, a deep reservoir to dunk the tea bag into, battery-powered bubbles and hours of pleasure.” They further promise that “one dunk of the boys into this fine testicle jacuzzi is sure to tickle your fancy and sooth your manliness.” I’ll have to take their word on that.
  5. It comes in a variety of colors. Whether you like to keep it classic with white or black versions or you want to bling out a bit with a shiny gold version (that’s $10,000 because it’s 14K gold-plated, I should mention), the Testicuzzi comes in multiple shades to suit your dude’s personal preferences.
  6. The first shipment will be out in time for Christmas. The folks behind Testicuzzi estimate their first chunk of orders will go out on December 10, meaning they should arrive in time for Christmas if you’re getting this for the guy in your life (or you’re a guy buying one for yourself). You’d better get ordering!
Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia