Why We Should Be Thankful For Our Exes

Exes aren’t always our go-to when we’re trying to drum up some happy memories, but they aren’t all bad. And even when they are pretty bad, they can still show us some pretty awesome things about ourselves. Here are some reasons why we should be thankful for our exes. Yes, all of them.

  1. At least they’re gone. But seriously, an ex is usually an ex for a reason.
  2. They were a big part of one phase of our life. Just because someone or something isn’t forever doesn’t mean it wasn’t a cool phase. Remember that bar you went to everyday a few years ago until it shut down? It’s a memory of a time and that’s it.
  3. They pushed us. Even if we didn’t like the ways that certain people pushed us, the experience still taught us something and we’re different people because of it.
  4. They cared about us. In some way, large or small, your exes chose you, and every drop of love out there should be good for something.
  5. They showed us what we don’t want. There’s nothing like a failed relationship to show you exactly what you don’t want to ever see again in the next one. Maybe you really wanted a successful career man, but realized you can’t be with a guy who’s married to his job. Now you know.
  6. Because of all the firsts. At one point, each step of a relationship was new and for some reason, out of all the people in the entire world, you and this one person shared some of those new moments together.
  7. All the practice sex. Hey, sex can only get better with practice, and refining your tastes towards better men, right?
  8. You can reflect on the signs that something was amiss. In retrospect, you can see where things started to go wrong. Next time you’ll know more quickly whether it’s time to talk some stuff out or if it’s time to get a move on.
  9. We got to keep some of the friends we made through our exes. Without your ex, you might never have met your good friend or your coworkers.
  10.  Sometimes you have to get hurt to know not to hurt other people. It’s not that any of us aim to be heartbreakers, but it certainly creates a different perspective for breaking up when you’ve been dumped hard.
  11. You get better at really seeing people. Relationships are intimate on a variety of levels, so every opportunity you have to see past the masks and walls we use, the greater your understanding for people becomes.
  12. You know some things that you definitely like. He might not have been your true love but you know for sure the next guy has to match or even outdo his gentlemen tendencies.
  13. We learn that love alone doesn’t necessarily carry a relationship. Without the hard work and commitment love alone won’t keep a duo together. Lesson learned so you don’t have to repeat that again.
  14. They paved the way to our next relationships. Whether you’ve got a man or not, the next guy might not have a chance if you were still with the last one.
Kate Ferguson is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blog and magazine genres. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce. Look for article links, updates, (and the occasional joke) on Twitter @KateFerg or @WriterKateFerg, or check out her personal blog ThatsRandomKate.blogspot.com