The Women Who Get The Guys Are The Ones That Remember These Important Things

There are lots of ways to attract men, but that doesn’t mean they’re all worthwhile. Women who remember these important things about their self-worth are the ones who not only get the good guys but keep them enthralled long-term. Keep these in mind and you won’t go wrong.

  1. They know their worth. Confidence is attractive, we know that. Therefore, when a woman understands what she brings to the table and believes what she offers is unique and special, she’ll be empowered to attract the types of guys that are actually right for her. They refuse to sacrifice this for anyone.
  2. They’re worth more than a f–kboy. Let’s be real, it’s easy for most women to find someone to sleep with. We hold all the cards and a lot of guys are desperate. Therefore, the guys we’re seeing have to be under no illusion: you’re with them because you choose to be. F–boys and short-term flings won’t cut it when you’re looking for something more long-term. Sure, he might have nice hair, but my values are stronger and more important. The women who get the guys know this inherently.
  3. Compromise is a necessity. Women who know the value of compromise and understand how much work goes into relationships will be able to maintain healthy relationships. They will get the right guys and they’ll keep them because relationships come in waves. You can’t expect to always have your way, even if you think you’re in the right. Being able to see things from another perspective will also widen your horizons, which is great for personal growth.
  4. Guys need to put in the effort. Women aren’t stupid, let me tell you that. The expectations in women’s minds from casual flings versus committed relationships cannot be understated. If he’s trying to intensify a relationship, he needs to put the effort in. Ask your girl out explicitly and clearly communicate your intentions. If he likes her, he should tell her — she will expect at least that if he’s going to demand more of her time. Women who understand that and assert those boundaries will succeed in relationships. If a guy hasn’t asked her out on a date but he’s asking her to hop in bed, expect resistance.
  5. They’re not interested in empty promises. There’s no point wasting your breath making promises that you have no intention of keeping. The women who get the good guys recognize the signs of future faking and they’re not interested. If a guy is saying something he doesn’t mean, he should just keep quiet. It’s easier to manage expectations that way, plus it means communication is more respectful and meaningful. Women need to know what is quality communication and what is a waste of their time.
  6. Bad communication is a red flag. Women who want to end up with the right guys know that bad communication is a relationship-ending red flag. It means that they won’t get their needs met, grow emotionally, or mature as a person if their partner isn’t ready to meet them where they’re at. There’s no point thinking “I can fix him” or “He’ll get there eventually.” No, these women understand that time is valuable and that they don’t exist to educate other men. It’ll only breed resentment and the relationship will fizzle out. Understanding that will mean that women can maximize their ability to get the best guys for them.
  1. You can teach sexual performance, you can’t teach emotional performance. Women that remember these things will set them right for a good partner. It pays to keep track of what you can and can’t teach. You can teach people to serve you, to cook better, or make you orgasm— that you can train. But you can’t train someone to love you or be emotionally sophisticated. Don’t accept that lower standard of connection. The right person will add to your life, not take it away.
  2. Their mental health comes first. It doesn’t pay to be the kind of person who expects a partner to keep their mental health in the right place. That’s your own responsibility — another person can’t be your caregiver from day one. Women that understand how to look after themselves, and how to assert what they need in order to do that are better placed to support the relationship when they themselves are supported.
  3. They know what their routine looks like. You can respect my own time and that’s important. You know what parts of your life are non-negotiable, and what parts offer a bit more flexibility. Asserting this clearly to any partners allows them to have the same expectations about your time, and you can receive that same information in return. It means there are no missed calls, canceled dates, or rainchecks. You respect each other’s routines. Women who get the guys follow this to a T.
  4. A little bit of thoughtfulness goes a long ay. Lots of guys get caught in their heads about what women want. They think that they need to do certain performative things, or cliches, that will magically appease women. Women aren’t simple creatures that can be satisfied with red roses and chocolate once a month. Sometimes we want peanut butter because we used the last of it last week, or we want five dollars for a coffee on a hard day. Guys should trust their gut, and they shouldn’t expect the basic cliches to mean that we’ll fall at their feet. Women who tell their partners that will end up with the right guys
  5. If they’re being vulnerable, their partners need to be vulnerable in return. Women who get the good guys are going to give as good as they get when they’re in a relationship, so they expect the same in return. Women who make that expectation clear are better placed to succeed in relationships because they don’t feel like their emotions and support are going down the drain.
  6. It’s important to seize the day. Women who seize the day attract guys who also do the same. Kiss each other when you want to, and book that mini-break when you can take time off work. Work out the details later but follow each other’s flow. Remember that you get money back, but your time will never be replaced.
  7. Equality works in all directions. Modern women know that we can order our own drinks. We can open our own doors too. That doesn’t mean that we will throw it back in guys’ faces if they do, but know that we won’t fall at their feet in wonder either. We should both be independent in relationships — that way some things are left to the imagination and there’s still room to grow. You’re equally invested and have equal control.
Hannah has a Masters degree in Romantic and Victorian literature in Scotland and spends her spare time writing anything from essays to short fiction about the life and times of the frogs in her local pond! She loves musical theatre, football, anything with potatoes, and remains a firm believer that most of the problems in this world can be solved by dancing around the kitchen to ABBA. You can find her on Instagram at @_hannahvic.