There’s No Such Thing As The Right Person At The Wrong Time

When you think you’ve finally met the right guy for you, only to end up breaking up, it’s easy to convince yourself that maybe things ended just because of bad timing. Telling yourself this may seem comforting, but it’s simply not true. There’s never a wrong time to find love — it can happen at any time, and if he was truly the right person, you would have handled any storms that came your way.  If it didn’t last, it means you weren’t meant to be together. Here’s why:

  1. You weren’t ready for a relationship. Sometimes you rush into a relationship without thinking about whether it’s what you really want — and when it gets difficult, you put it down to bad timing, but it could simply be that he just wasn’t the right person for you. It doesn’t mean that you’re solely responsible for the breakup, and you don’t need to feel guilty about it. You can’t expect to get it right every time.
  2. Sometimes fear takes over. We’re all scared of falling in love. It’s a normal emotion that we all experience at some point in our lives. When a relationship starts getting serious, it’s easy to panic and want out ASAP. You shouldn’t feel embarrassed about that, but you should own up to the fact that sometimes your fear gets the better of you. Maybe you need to work on yourself and deal with your own insecurities first. That’s not a bad thing.
  3. You wanted different things. It’s difficult to make a relationship work when you’re two completely different people with opposite values. Sure, you can try, but ultimately nothing good will come out of it except a lesson in heartbreak. At least this allows you to move on and find someone better suited to you.
  4. You have higher priorities right now. Between meeting work deadlines, organizing trips, and making plans, where does a boyfriend fit into this? Naturally, you blame the relationship failing on your hectic life, but you should remember that there’s never a right time for someone to enter your life. Of course there will be compromises, but if you really loved them, it wouldn’t be an issue. There’s no shame in admitting that you’d rather focus on things other than love at the moment.
  5. There were too many challenges. Everyone experiences different challenges in a relationship — even the happiest couples aren’t without their issues. Arguments are expected, tension will definitely rise, and it’s easier to walk away than face the problems head on.
  6. You haven’t learned to love yourself. The sad truth is that you can’t really expect to be happy with someone else if you don’t love and respect yourself first. And you definitely can’t depend on your partner for your happiness. It could be that there wasn’t a problem with him, the problem was with you. Your inability to see your own self-worth probably caused the demise of your relationship.
  7. Lack of effort from both sides. There has to be mutual effort for a relationship to last. If you’re putting in more effort than your partner is, it’s going to become one-sided, and that’s an obvious sign that their heart isn’t really in it. But if neither of you are putting in a joint effort and trying to make things work, it’s only a matter of time before the relationship falls apart.
  8. You’re too young and have some soul searching to do. This is an excuse that’s made out of fear of love and rejection. You want to protect yourself from being hurt, so you put up barriers to shut others out. However, the right person wouldn’t hinder you from finding yourself, they would be there to encourage and guide you. Why couldn’t you discover who you are with this person? Maybe there’s something in your gut telling you this feels wrong.
  9. You just got out of another relationship. Without a doubt the most common excuse from anyone who doesn’t want to commit. You probably haven’t moved on from your ex yet or maybe he hurt you so badly that you’re having a hard time recovering from this. It could take a while, but the right guy would be patient; he wouldn’t walk away. There’s no such thing as the right person at the wrong time.
  10. It’s a huge lie. This concept that an amazing guy entered your life at the wrong time sounds crazy, and that’s because it is. If two people love each other, they’ll find a way to make it work. And when it doesn’t work out, own up to the fact that you just weren’t right for each other. Don’t make excuses or shift the blame on to fate (which doesn’t really exist, FYI) just accept that breakups happen. There’s never a wrong time for a great guy to enter your life, but when he does, you will do everything to keep him.
Coralle is a freelance writer with an interest in relationships, women's health and parenting. In her free time, she enjoys reading, watching new Netflix shows and spending time with family.