10 Things My Boyfriend Does To Make Me Feel Secure In Our Relationship

I’ve dated my fair share of guys who constantly made me doubt our relationship and myself). It got to the point that I never thought it would be possible to feel so loved, comfortable, and happy with someone until I met my current boyfriend.

  1. He’s honest and transparent about everything. And yes, that includes his past and the way he feels about me. I never have to wonder what he’s thinking or question how he feels about me. Since the day I met him, he has always been honest and open with me about anything and everything. I truly believe that honesty is one of the most important parts of a relationship, and because he’s never lied to me, it’s a lot easier for me to be completely open with him. He also never judges me or makes me feel bad about anything that I tell him, even if it’s something that embarrasses me.
  2. He values my time. He doesn’t take my presence for granted the way a lot of my partners did before. He makes sure I know that he appreciates when I spend time with him and doesn’t just expect me to hang around. We take turns making decisions about how we spend our time together. Furthermore, when we are together, he rarely uses his phone. I’m not gonna lie, I have a hard time staying off of my phone most of the time, but the fact that my boyfriend rarely uses his when we’re together motivates me to put mine away as well.
  3. He has no problem apologizing. If anything, he apologizes too much. However, one of the reasons I feel so secure being with him is that he always takes responsibility for situations or problems without trying to make excuses or blame me for them. When I’m at fault, I have no issue doing the same.
  4. He builds me up instead of breaking me down. A lot of guys I’ve dated were insecure or overly jealous, which is definitely not the case with my boyfriend. He loves when I’m confident in myself and instead of making me feel guilty for dressing a certain way, wearing makeup, or doing my hair, he encourages me to be expressive. He also celebrates my successes and supports any dream I have without worrying that it might take attention or time away from him and our relationship.
  5. He shows up for me no matter what the situation is. If I ask him to do something with me, I don’t have to beg him or convince him to show up. He is more than happy to be there for me in all situations, whether it’s a trip to the doctor’s office, going out to a bar with my friends, or running boring errands. I love that I can count on him for anything and know that he’ll be by my side through the ups and downs of life.
  6. He doesn’t try to control or change me. He supports me and loves me exactly the way I am and encourages me to be myself. I find it odd how many of my personality traits that have attracted guys in the past become things that they want to change about me once we get into a relationship, like my spontaneity, my friendliness, and my sense of style. My boyfriend has never tried to control or change anything about me, but the way that he treats me and his approach to life in general inspires me to be a better person.
  7. He treats me the same way no matter who else is around. He treats me with the same love, admiration, and respect whether we’re alone or around other people. I’ve been in relationships in the past where I would feel ignored when we were out in public even though we had great chemistry when it was just the two of us. I’ve also been in relationships where my boyfriend acted one way towards me around other people, making it seem like he was easygoing and compassionate to the outside world but would do a complete 180 when it was just me and him.
  8. I never have to worry about how he’s going to react. I know that no matter what happens in life, I never have to be afraid or worried about the way my boyfriend will react to a situation, whether it’s good or bad, my fault or not. He’s very level-headed and doesn’t react to anything without thinking, which makes me feel very safe.
  9. He compliments me often, but not just about my looks. Don’t get me wrong, he tells me how beautiful and hot I am, which of course I appreciate. However, he compliments my personality, my work, my talents, and the way I treat other people just as much, and maybe even more. He makes sure I know that he thinks I’m the most beautiful woman in the world, but also that my best and most important qualities have nothing to do with the way I look.
  10. He’s consistent. I think the biggest reason I feel so completely secure in my relationship is that my boyfriend is always consistent. He doesn’t play games and he is the person that he says he is, all of the time. He keeps promises, he shows up, and he doesn’t change the way he acts depending on the situation or his mood.
Kerry is a freelance writer from Boston, Massachusetts who now lives in the Sunshine State with the love of her life and her 15 month old daughter. She writes frequently about her personal experiences (find more of her work on www.followmetogetlost.wordpress.com). She has an Etsy shop with cute items: https://www.etsy.com/shop/FollowMeToGetLostWhen she's not writing, she loves to spend time outside, at the beach, and with her family.