There’s nothing I dislike more than having to explain myself to someone, especially a guy! I don’t need to convince someone of my worth or show them with my own eyes and neither do you. That’s why it’s time to stop justifying these things to them.
Not wanting to have kids
I don’t see myself becoming a mom. I love kids, don’t get me wrong, but I have my reservations. I don’t need a guy’s approval; he’s either OK with it or he’s not. I also don’t need a guy who thinks he’ll change my mind. Having said that, I’m pro-choice. No guy has the right to tell me what to do with my own body. I don’t belong to anyone but myself. It’s my personal choice to decide whether I want to bring a child to this world or not.
My religious beliefs
I’m not a religious person. When I was younger, it was really hard for me to share that with guys I liked because I was afraid of their judgment. I was worried that it would be the reason they won’t commit to me. As I got older, I realized that my standpoint on religion wasn’t just an opinion, it was a lifestyle, and I’m not willing to let go of it for a guy or anyone/anything else.
I don’t need to make sense of my baggage to a guy. The truth is, he either gets that I have complicated past experiences or he doesn’t. I’m scared of commitment. I have daddy issues, a fear of abandonment, and worry that I’m often misunderstood. I don’t need to tell a guy my life story so that he gets why I’m so messed up in some areas. I don’t want anyone who sees my broken pieces as weakness, I want a guy who sees my baggage beautiful.
What I do for a living
I dated a guy who criticized my job. He thought it was stressful and he was right—my mental health was non-existent. However, he didn’t see why I was doing it. He didn’t see the joy and pride I felt every day. A guy who disagrees with me on my career choice is a guy who fails to understand my vision. I don’t want a guy who underestimates my job or isn’t supportive of it. I want a guy who sees my passion as a turn-on.
My family dynamic
I have a complicated family, that’s no secret. There’s no way I can be with someone who doesn’t accept that because my family is a part of who I am. I need to be with a guy who doesn’t think there’s something wrong with me because I don’t stay in touch with everyone.
My past relationships
I don’t need to explain to a guy what I saw in an ex of mine. I don’t need to justify my choices when it comes to my love life and who I get in bed with. I’m done falling in the trap of having my heart make sense to a guy. I want a guy who understands why I fell in love without asking why because he knows what makes my heart melts.
My daily struggles as a woman
A guy can never relate to a woman’s experiences unless he was in her shoes. There are some guys who don’t realize the misogynist comments, behaviors, and rules that women experience every day. I don’t want to be around a guy who thinks I’m being emotional and dramatic because I’m on my period, or that I’m being sensitive about not being taken seriously at work just because I’m a girl.
Not wanting to have sex
Sex is a two-way street, and I don’t want a guy who doesn’t meet me halfway. I’m allowed to say no without giving a reason. I’m allowed to change my mind. I don’t want a guy who gets offended when I turn him down, and I don’t want a guy who pressures me to get intimate with him when I’m not ready.
What I’m up to
I don’t need to tell a guy what my everyday life looks like. There’s nothing I hate more than talking to a guy who makes me feel like I’m under investigation asking me questions like “what are you up to?” at 2 a.m. or “who did you go with?” referring to the last trip I had out of town. If a guy doesn’t trust me to have a life of my own, he shouldn’t be in it in the first place.
Who I’m friends with
A guy I knew made a disrespectful comment about some friends we hung out with one time which made me realize how incompatible we were. I don’t want a guy who thinks he knows what’s best for me more than I do. Honestly, a boyfriend who doesn’t get along with my friends is a straight-up headache.
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