Chemistry in the bedroom (or the lack of it) can make or break a relationship. What makes someone good at intimacy? Many of his skills might be the result of past experience, but a lot of things that’ll make you want to sleep with him again have nothing to do with his moves and everything to do with his behavior.
He’s passionate about you, not just about making love.
When a guy is passionate about you as opposed to merely being enthusiastic about getting it on, it’s obvious and it makes the love-making so much better. If you feel the same way about him, the combined energy makes for an incredible experience.
He’s giving, not selfish.
Guys who aim to please in bed are awesome. If he spends time and makes an effort ensuring your satisfaction, you’ll never settle for “wham, bam, thank you ma’am” experiences again.
He doesn’t pressure you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with.
Comfort and trust are important aspects of intimacy, so it’s hard to enjoy it if the one you’re with tries to push you too far. There’s a difference between comfortably experimenting with new things and being pressured into scary new places. A good lover will respect your hard limits and work to maintain your trust.
He can be dominant or submissive, depending on your mood.
The best kind of guy to be with is the one who’s adaptable. Whether you’re in the mood to tie him up or to be tied up yourself, he should be able to roll with the punches (sometimes literally, if you’re into that).
He’s a master of foreplay.
A guy who’s truly good in bed will bring you close to (if not all the way to) ecstasy before he ever gets near you. Most women don’t get all the way there from penetration alone, and he should care about pleasing you.
He kisses you only in bed.
Kissing shouldn’t only be done at the beginning of the encounter; it’s great throughout the entire experience because it keeps the connection and the mood strong. The true bedroom connoisseur will keep on kissing you because he knows it makes the experience better and because he wants to.
He communicates with you clearly before, during, and after.
Communication is a huge part of intimacy because both of you need to be on the same page about everything that goes on. The guys who are the best at intimacy are the ones who have good communication skills; they find out what you like, make sure to achieve optimum results, and find out if they need to change anything they’re doing in order to make it better.
He likes it fast or slow.
We know that it’s not attractive or fulfilling to be with a dude who’s in jackhammer mode constantly, but some men still haven’t received the memo. Let this be an official PSA to the men of the world: slow love-making is enjoyable sometimes too.
Nice guys finish last.
It just makes sense that, whenever possible, he should make sure you finish before he does. After all, he’ll be out of commission for a little while after he finishes, but you’ll still be trying to get to your final destination.
Nice guys cuddle too.
We all know that cuddling is awesome, especially right after a big O. The best guy to have in your bed is the one who wants to cuddle afterward and make the entire experience complete.
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