11 Things You Should Know About The Person You’re Seeing After 3 Dates

Your first few dates are meant to be casual and fun, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be looking out for signs that this person has relationship potential. To help you along, here are 11 things you should aim to know about the person after three dates.

  1. How well they text You should be texting a lot, even if you’re not seeing each other a lot because it’s such early days in your relationship. Textual chemistry is as important as sexual chemistry, and not just because everyone’s glued to their devices. You want to know that you connect in different ways.
  2. What their family is like You shouldn’t judge someone based on who they’re related to, but there’s no doubt that a person’s family situation is important. Knowing a bit more about it can help you see if there are issues there, like issues your partner has from early on in life, and what those Sunday dinners will be like if you guys date seriously. Also, if he or she doesn’t really prioritize their family but you do, that could cause problems.
  3. What their values are You know the drill: you need to be sure your values are aligned with your partners for long-term relationship success. By the third date,  you should know what your partner values are and what’s really important to them. If they’re all about making moolah so they can retire at 45 or they’re focused on happiness as the greatest form of success, you want to know that now.
  4. What their dating goals are What are they looking for? What do they want in a relationship? Heck, are they even looking for a serious relationship? These are super-important to know about right away so you don’t waste your time.
  5. How they see the metaphorical glass Does the person you’re dating have a positive outlook on life, as in they see the glass half-full, or are they quite negative about everything? This is important because you want to be with someone who’s got a good attitude and makes you feel upbeat and positive when you’re around them.
  6. If you want a fourth date or not By the third date, things are slowly becoming a bit more serious. By now, you should know if you want to continue seeing the person or if what little connection you had at the beginning has fizzled out.
  7. If you share Friday night plans While it’s healthy to do your own thing in your relationship from time to time, you and your partner should have some activities you like to do together. And no, sex isn’t the only relationship activity you should be enjoying. I mean, what happens when the weekend rolls around and your partner wants to get sloshed at the pub again but you were hoping for something different? If you don’t enjoy some of the same things, you’re going to be disappointed in your relationship.
  8. What they want out of life This is important because you want to be with someone who has dreams and knows where they’re going. You don’t want to be with someone who’s just sort of floating around. Also, you want to be sure that where you’re headed and where your partner is headed are similar so that you can build a future together.
  9. What their friends are like Ask them to tell you what their friends are like. If they collapse with laughter while telling you how their friends pull childish pranks on others, this could be a red flag that you’re dealing with a man-child. You want to suss out if their social circle is similar to yours, as that will mean that you and your partner will get along.
  10. What makes them pissed off It takes a while to really know someone and what they’re like when things don’t go their way, but it helps to dig around a little to find out what makes them angry. If they seem to be angry all the time or they get riled up quickly, that’s a red flag. You don’t need someone who’s so explosive in your life.
  11. What they consider to be cheating With so many definitions of cheating, it helps to know where the person stands on the whole issue. You might think emotional cheating is a thing whereas they don’t or vice versa. Having this chat will uncover a lot about what they want from a relationship as well as their values.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.