Your 20s and even your 30s are transitional periods that help shape your later years. Although people talk about college and post-grad as the best years of your life, that definitely seems to be a big fat lie. These are the years when you’re constantly faced with decisions to make on a daily basis, some of which could determine the course of the rest of your life. No matter what you’re facing, here are 10 things to remember when you’re making a major life change.
It’ll be harder than you think. Change is hard, but you already know that. Things often come up that we never could have predicted. We face tons of challenges that seem insurmountable, but as long as you know that things will be hard a little while and that you’ll eventually get through it, you’ll be just fine.
It’ll be easier than you think. At the same time, if you’re making a big change – moving to a new city, changing jobs, breaking up with your bad boyfriend – then you probably already know this is the right thing for you. Your transition will be much simpler than you expect because you’re doing something you believe in. Hopefully it’ll even be fun, because otherwise what’s the point?
You can always go back. We tend to think of big decisions as ironclad, but that’s not the case at all. If you move and you hate the new place, you can always move back home. If you change jobs and it’s still not the right position, go ahead and find another one.
Everyone does it. We all want to think we’re super unique and that there’s no one else in the world like us. That’s true, but it’s also true that there are lots of universal human experiences. Once you start telling people what you’re considering, you’ll be surprised at how supportive and understanding they are. They might be thinking the exact same things themselves.
You’re not crazy. It’s hard not to think we’re totally nuts when we think about making a massive life change. Just remember that you’re not. You’re allowed to do what you want to do – it’s your life, after all. Even if your parents aren’t super into your choices or your aunt gives you a hard time, just shrug it off. If you think it’s the right choice, it 100 percent is.
You’re building a better life. When we’re unhappy and desperately searching for a cure, we tend to think big picture. We want to move to an exciting new place. We want to quit our crappy job and go freelance. We commit ourselves to the dating process to find someone we truly care about. When it feels super scary – and it will – just remember that things can only go up from here if you’re going through a rough time.
You’re not making this decision alone. Of course it’s your life and you’ll be the one moving in with your long-time BF/changing careers/moving/etc. But your friends and parents are super invested in your choices and well-being, too. They want you to be happy and they’ll most likely be psyched for you (if they’re worth keeping in your life, of course). Don’t forget that others will be interested in knowing the reasons behind your big decision and how you’re feeling so that they can properly support you.
If you’re not changing, you’re not growing. Even if you’re surrounded by friends who are happy with their single status and don’t want to make any huge decisions, that doesn’t mean you can’t stray from the pack. Life is change, basically. You already know what your life looks like from day to day now – so why not change it? You’re going to grow into the person you were always meant to be, and that’s pretty cool.
It only has to make sense to you. If you tell people your news and they don’t get it, that will definitely suck, but you don’t need to drive yourself absolutely insane making sure they totally understand. You just need to make yourself happy.
You should be more excited than nervous. These two often go together like peanut butter and jelly. You should probably feel way more excitement than nerves once you’ve finalized your decision, because life is meant to be lived and you should enjoy yourself. If you’re too nervous, that could be a sign this isn’t the right thing for you. Listen to yourself, be honest and you’ll make the right decision.
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