10 Things You Stop Caring About When You’re A Grown Woman

There’s one truth about getting older that a lot of people don’t tell you: you develop a new type of confidence and a thicker skin. As life goes on, we strong, badass women get better at navigating through it. Here are things you just don’t have the time or patience to care about as much when you become a grown woman.

  1. Whether or not your legs are perfectly shaved Remember back in the day when you used to spend an hour in the shower? There’s nothing better than a shaved leg, especially in the summertime. But if you have no time for it or just don’t feel like it, who cares? The people you’ve surrounded yourself with at this point aren’t bothered if you’re sprouting a little leg hair. They likely are too.
  2. What strangers think of you Back when I was a teenager, I invested so much time worrying that actual strangers were judging me based on my appearance. But as you get older and become a real woman, you recognize the fact that people are usually too preoccupied with themselves to pay you any attention. Gasp! The world didn’t revolve around me after all!
  3. Following trends Know what’s trendy? Being comfortable. Why should we suffer in a pair of stiff stilettos in the name of fashion? Wouldn’t we enjoy ourselves a lot more if we didn’t think we were going to twist our ankle or trip over something every second? When you make an effort to dress up, you look good. Trends go out of style so quickly and trying to constantly keep up is just a waste of money.
  4. Other people’s relationships Back in my twenties, it was common to sit around the bar and gossip about other people. These days, that kind of behavior is pretty disgusting. Unless someone’s in a really bad situation that they need help getting out of, it’s not my business to know the ins and outs of someone else’s relationship. If they’re happy, I’m happy. Keeping up with those details is something I definitely don’t miss.
  5. Parental expectations When we’re growing up, we try really hard to please our parents and make all the right calls. But as grown women, we start realizing that our opinions matter too. You’re not put on earth just to make someone else happy. If you really want a tattoo but feel your parents won’t approve, go out and get it—you’re an adult. If your job is less than what they expected, stop feeling guilty about “disappointing” them. Your own happiness counts and your schedule and personal decisions matter.
  6. How much money other people have As you get older, you realize that happiness and satisfaction matter more than the amount of money you have. Yes, it’s important to have enough to pay the bills and not go into debt, but you don’t feel like you’re competing with anyone else when you’re a grown woma. When you befriend someone else, you don’t care if they’re loaded. You care if they’re kind and compassionate.
  7. Making or hearing excuses Grown women take responsibility for their own lives. If they’re late for work, they acknowledge it and apologize—they don’t blame the dog, the traffic, or the weather. When you’re a grown woman, you know that people make mistakes and that life can often be difficult. You’d rather be real and admit that you have faults.
  8. Friendship order Yes, it can still sting a little bit if you consider someone to be in your A-list group of friends when you’re only in their B or C-list, but you no longer lose sleep over it the way you did growing up. You’re just happy that you’ve maintained solid friendships over the years, especially since finding friends as an adult is a lot more complicated.
  9. Someone not liking you Hey, people pleasers out there! Doesn’t it hurt when you realize that someone doesn’t like you? Nobody wants to be disliked, but when you’re a grown woman, you realize that people may turn on you for the smallest, most uncontrollable issues. As you mature, “you win some, you lose some” makes a lot more sense. It’s not worth it to dedicate a ton of time towards someone who’s not a fan of you.
  10. Someone not responding back right away It can hurt to send a text and never get a reply. But these days, you acknowledge the fact that your friends just may be busy if it’s a one-off offense. That, or maybe they’re in an area that gets poor reception. You no longer take it as a personal diss. People have their own lives, and not responding back ASAP doesn’t mean they don’t care about you.
Karen Belz is a New Jersey native who is currently living in Maryland. She has a Bachelor’s Degree in Speech Communication with a focus in Broadcasting and Print Media Studies from Millersville University of Pennsylvania. Since graduating, she has written for sites like LittleThings, HelloGiggles, and Scary Mommy and is currently an e-commerce editor at Bustle.

When she's not writing, she enjoys making her phone run out of memory after taking too many photos of her dog. You can find her on Twitter @karenebelz or on Instagram @karenbelz.