The secret language that best friends share means that you can convey complex ideas and emotions to each other with little more than a few words and a look. Through all life’s trials and tribulations, our besties always have our backs — and even when it feels like no one else could possibly understand, we know that our BFFs will. Sometimes, the things that we say can get lost in translation, but when it comes to our best friends, we’re especially lucky because we know they’ll always know what we mean when we say these things:
There’s not a person on the planet who would believe this lie when we’re pretty obviously as far from fine as you can get. But while our significant others are still trying to puzzle out what they’ve done wrong, our BFFs can tell in an instant whether we failed a class, got dumped or just spent too much money at Starbucks earlier.
“Does this look okay?”
Men will still be puzzling out the right way to answer this question at the end of time itself, but a bestie can effortlessly tell whether we’re asking for an ego boost or we’re begging them, “Please help me fix this hot mess.”
“I’m thinking about doing something new with my hair.”
A casual friend might respond, “Cool,” and a good friend will ask for details. But a true best friend will know in an instant whether you mean that you’ve been browsing for pixie cuts on Pinterest or that you’re having an existential crisis and you’re about to do something drastic.
“I’ll help you bury the body.”
Most people don’t take kindly to casually suggesting murder, but when someone’s hurt your #1, your BFF knows that you’re joking… mostly. Lucky for the two of you, you know you won’t sell each other out, either — you ain’t no snitches.
“Oh my god, I’m going to marry him.”
Anyone else might give you that “you’re a crazy ho” side-eye, but your best friend knows that you’re not jumping the gun here — your man’s just done something particularly insightful and commendable. Your bestie won’t go telling you, “Damn girl, slow down.” If anything, she’ll just ask what kind of flowers he sent.
“He’s so stupid, I hate him.”
Venting like this will make the rest of the world wonder why, if you hate a guy so much, you’re even still wasting time with him, but your BFF will just shake her head. She knows what you really mean: you’re head over heels for this idiot, and if he’s smart, he’ll find a way to make it up to you before it’s too late.
“I don’t feel like going out tonight.”
Sometimes, we just need someone to give us the right motivation, so while the rest of our friends will send their regards and head out without us, our bestie knows good and well that this is code for, “Please convince me to leave my apartment, I am becoming one with the couch and unsure of how to break free.”
While any other nearby individuals will be looking around for whatever axe murderer is making you scream bloody murder like that, your BFF will be running towards you, screeching right back. This is universally known as BFF code for, “I haven’t seen you in at least twelve hours and my life has been so empty in your absence, never leave my side again.”
“We need to go get coffee… like, right now.”
No, we’re not so desperate for a cup of joe that we’re demanding our best friend leave the comfort of her home immediately in order to acquire some — and they know it. What we really mean is that we have a story so incredible, outrageous or horrendous to tell them that it needs to be told in person and it cannot wait — and our best friend will be putting on her shoes and heading out the door ASAP in response.
“What are you wearing?”
To the rest of the world, it might sound like you’re asking about the dress code, but in BFF speak this is inarguably a question of whether or not they’re going to look cute — because that means that you’re going to have to as well. If your squad is showing up on point, you need to know it… because like it or not, you’re going to have to look hot too.
“You’re not allowed to look cute.”
It might sound a little controlling to an outsider, but our BFFs know that this is a plea for mercy. Whether we’re in full PMS acne mode or our hair is just not cooperating at the moment, it’s unspoken girl code that your BFF will join you in looking like a total scrub — because besties don’t let besties look like trashbags alone.
“I’ll get the check.”
This isn’t any kind of weird power play where you’re flashing your wealth to establish dominance. Your best friend knows as well as you do that the two of you are locked in an endless cycle of being low-key indebted to each other for anything from lattes to lipgloss. Even though you’re not keeping track, it’s just assumed that you always owe each other money — and you know she’ll grab the bill next time.
“So, last night I…”
Casual observers might think that this is going to lead into a kinda-funny story of your late-night antics, but a BFF knows instantly that it’s either going to be a recap of your promiscuous adventures, a tale so insane that she’s going to end up doing an honest-to-god spit-take, or a full briefing on what you binge-watched on Netflix and ate for dinner — there is no in between.
“I just bought a box of Franzia.”
The quintessential BFF code-red that you both know really means, “I’m about to make 5-liters worth of bad decisions and I need a co-conspirator.” By the time you get a reply to this text, she’s already at your house with an overnight bag, a stash of ibuprofen and two bottles of Pedialyte for tomorrow morning.
“I miss you.”
When you say this to anyone else, an “I miss you” is just an “I miss you,” but to your BFF, it’s so much beyond that. Things aren’t quite the same when she’s not around whether she’s half a country away… or if you’re just texting her in the ladies room while she uses the next stall over. No matter if it’s been years or just a few minutes, your BFF knows — because she misses you too.
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