Relationships come in all different forms, and there’s no ‘one size fits all’ formula when it comes to our significant others. Every romance has its ups and downs that couples have to learn to navigate through if they want any chance of surviving. And while we all have our unique deal breakers that are based on personal experience and preferences, there are some things NONE of us should put up with in relationships, no matter what. If any of these are happening to you, it’s likely time to get out now.
- Frequent insults. We’ve all been insulted, but there’s a difference between a playful jab and a repeated put-downs. These can happen in private or public, and maybe he laughs, but to you, it’s not funny. What’s worse is when you jokingly insult him back and he completely loses his cool.
- Humiliation. This could mean bringing up an embarrassing story in front of your boss or talking about how bad you are in bed when you’re out with his friends. The idea is to make everyone else laugh at your expense. Once again, if it’s not funny to you, you might want to leave.
- Constant fight-picking. Every relationship is full of random fights. But if he takes every opportunity to start an argument, like yelling at you for not turning up the TV volume fast enough or forgetting milk at the grocery store, that’s a serious problem.
- Being blamed for everything. Do you feel like you can’t do anything right? It’s not you, it’s him – he clearly gets off on blaming you and making you feel like crap. After all, if he makes you responsible for everything, it means he can do no wrong. It’s BS, and you don’t have to take it.
- Ridicule about your beliefs & morals. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs and morals, and you’re no exception. You should never have to stay in a situation where someone constantly ridicules what you believe in. The longer you stay in that situation, the more likely you are to cave. Stay true to yourself and get out of the situation now.
- Attacks on your self-esteem. Every negative word out of their mouth slowly rips away at your self-esteem. You may not realize it at first, but over time, you’re no longer confident. You might feel ugly, unworthy and unable to do anything. You stop smiling and having fun because you stop loving yourself. Don’t let anyone do this to you.
- Put downs against your friends & family. If he desperately tries to make you hate everything and everyone else besides him, it’s a serious red flag. He might seem well liked, but once you step back, you realize he’s a lonely guy. Why else would he try to isolate you from everything else in your life? You don’t owe him anything – leave.
- Frequent mood swings. If he’s wonderful for a week and then turns on you one day for no reason, that’s a big scary. It constantly keeps you guessing because he’ll tell you he loves you one day and then makes you feel useless the next. No matter how bad of a day he might have had, degrading you is never okay. These mood swings will only get worse. Get out before that happens.
- Feeling uneasy or anxious when he’s around. Trust your instincts. Your body tries to tell you the person isn’t right for you by making you feel anxious or uneasy. If you’re constantly on edge, that should probably tell you something. Is this really the type of relationship you need in your life? A person who really cares about you wouldn’t make you feel this way. Listen to your gut.
- Constantly feeling like you want to cry. Crying happens in all types of relationships. If you find yourself wanting to just curl up and cry more often than not, however, there’s a problem. This means the person – and the relationship in general – is taking away all of your happiness. Why should they have that power? You control your happiness and the first step is to leave that person far behind.
You don’t have to take it and you deserve someone better in your life. Value yourself and get away from the toxic relationship.