It goes without saying that not all of us are lucky enough to be having great sex. And hey, you might think it could be worse — you could be having no sex at all! — but that doesn’t mean you should settle for mediocrity. A survey by Lovehoney discovered that 80% of people are unhappy with their sex lives, and women in particular are suffering. In fact, only 17% of women said they were pleased with the intimacy they’re having.
Sexual satisfaction varies with age, it should be noted. Younger people are less experienced and also less likely to know what they want or how to ask for it, so it makes sense that only 16% of 18- to 24-year-olds and 17% of 25- to 34-year-olds reported sexual happiness. However, more than 33% of people over the age of 55 are loving what’s going down in the bedroom, so that goes to show that sex truly does get better with age.
Body image issues are keeping women from truly enjoying sex
There are many reasons a person might feel less than happy with their sex life. The Lovehoney survey found that body image issues are a major hindrance, with 25% saying they feel too conscious to truly let go and enjoy sex. In fact, a third of women said that’s THE thing that’s keeping them from having a good sex life. Just under 25% said a low libido contributed to their dissatisfaction.
However, it’s important to note that these issues don’t just affect women. Just over 11% of men surveyed said they feel conscious of their bodies and get in their heads about it when having sex. Around the same amount, 12%, admitted having a low sex drive, as well. While the issue is clearly more prevalent in women, it does exist across the board.
So, what’s the answer to helping women (and men!) who don’t enjoy sex? Communication is key, for one. It’s important to be able to share your thoughts and feelings, good or bad, with your partner. You also need to build up a foundation of trust in order to feel comfortable and safe in the knowledge that you’re not being judged. Finally, if you have deep-seated body image issues or other trauma that keeps you from being able to fully engage sexually, there’s nothing wrong with seeking therapy from a professional. It could make all the difference!