I Thought I Knew You, But Our Breakup Showed Me Your True Colors

I thought I loved you when we were together, but after we broke up, I realized that I barely knew you at all. Our breakup showed me your true colors, and I definitely don’t like what I see.

  1. I don’t know if I ever really knew you. I thought you were one person, but our breakup showed me another. All the things I once loved about you slipped away. I felt as if you’d put on a show for me the entire time we were together, pretending to be the kind of guy I would love. It was as if you got sick of acting and you finally revealed your true self — just another jerk who cares way too much about what other people think.
  2. You’re an incredible narcissist. After we broke up, it wasn’t just me you dumped — you ditched everyone else who was a part of your old life. Suddenly you were too good for your old friends. You thought you were so much better than everyone else, but the truth is you’re just a judgmental jerk with no credits to back up your undeniable narcissism. I finally realized that you couldn’t love me properly because you were too busy being in love with yourself.
  3. I don’t know if you ever really loved me. At the end of our relationship, you treated me like I was nothing. You threw away years like they meant nothing to you. You moved on as if I was never really truly in your heart. I was an amazing girlfriend to you, we both knew that, but you treated me like I was crazy. You may not have loved me at the end, but if you ever loved me at all, you would have ended things more graciously.
  4. Because of you, I don’t know how to trust anymore. You were supposed to be the person I could trust above all others. I truly believed that and you played me like a fool. I allowed myself to be vulnerable and in the end, you used that against me. You made me think that you could be trusted, but after we broke up I realized that almost every word you ever spoke was a lie.
  5. You made me afraid to fall in love again. You promised you’d love me forever. We planned out our entire lives together and I watched that dream shatter to pieces. You made me feel safe and secure. You made me believe that we were stable, but you were living one big lie. Deep down, you were completely uncertain about us, but you never shared a shred of that doubt with me. That’s why I’m too afraid to let myself fall in love and believe in someone again.
  6. You used me while you transitioned to a new life. I thought we were creating a new life together, but after our breakup, I realized that you only wanted me around until you felt comfortable in your new life. I thought you were just starting out ahead of me and that we would catch up to each other eventually, but all along, while I was planning our future, you were planning to someday leave me behind.
  7. You led me on. It wasn’t until the end that I realized I was your security blanket. You were keeping me around just in case you never found someone better. I was your backup plan but you made me believe I was your ONLY plan. All that time, I thought that we were on the same page dreaming of the same future, but after our breakup, it was clear that I was plan B.
  8. You only ever cared about yourself. I didn’t realize how selfish you were until you finally broke things off. Everything was my fault and you didn’t take blame for a single piece of our breakup. All you wanted to talk about were my mistakes but you didn’t own up to anything that you did wrong. That’s when I realized that you never cared about me or my happiness. All you cared about was how you felt and you took no responsibility for how you treated me.
  9. You have no sense of compassion. You didn’t even have the decency to break up with me in person. Even while you were in the middle of breaking things off, you acted like you were the one needing comforting. You acted like you were the one in pain when in reality, I was dying inside. You couldn’t see the hell you were putting me through because you didn’t care enough to open your damn eyes. I finally realized that you didn’t care how much you hurt me as long as you turned out okay in the end.
  10. I loved who I thought you were. I hated the man you turned out to be, though. The man I loved was kind, funny, and humble. The guy who broke up with me was cruel, judgmental, and arrogant. I still can’t figure out whether you simply changed over time or whether I just never really knew the real you. Regardless of that, I know you now and I can wholeheartedly say that I definitely don’t love (let alone like) the real you.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.