To My Ex-Boyfriend Who Thought I’d Never Get Over Him

To My Ex-Boyfriend Who Thought I’d Never Get Over Him ©iStock/domoyega

We were on and off for over half a decade. It’s sad, but I was used to mediocre love, and whenever we broke up, I was depressed, devastated and felt like I’d never get over you — and you often swore I wouldn’t. Now that we’ve finally ended things for good, things are different. I refuse to let the breakup derail me, no matter what you say. If you think I can’t live without you, you have no idea who I am.

  1. I did it before and I’ll do it again. Before I met you, I had no idea who you were and I was perfectly content with my life. I hung out with friends, I went to work and I just did me. Sure, losing someone I loved is hard, but it’s a whole lot easier knowing that without you, I’ll be better than fine.
  2. You weren’t the be-all and end-all of guys. You didn’t take me seriously and even spent some time knocking me down a few pegs just for the fun of it. You weren’t a great boyfriend. Accepting that once and for all has allowed me to realize that not only will I be OK, I’ll be better than I ever was with you.
  3. I deserve a better life, even if that means being alone. Settling for less than I deserve became a routine with you, but now I’m not settling for anything. I deserve better than what you gave me — in fact, I deserve the best, and I plan on getting it — even if I have to get it myself.
  4. I’m fully capable of handling my own crap. When it came to lifting heavy boxes or fixing things around the house, I grew accustomed to you being around to do it. But guess what — I’m a strong, independent woman and I can do it my damn self. I don’t need you and I never did.
  5. You held me back. We never did anything fun. If I suggested a road trip, you whined about it being too far and not wanting to drive for that long. Well, no more of that BS. I’m going to live my best life to the fullest and never look back now that I don’t have anyone else to answer to.
  6. The first days are the hardest. Every day I wake up without you is another day that I can make my life whatever I want it to be. I’m still breathing, showering, getting dressed and getting my stuff done — and having a lot of fun too. You weren’t my lifeline and I definitely don’t need you to survive.
  7. Finding someone new isn’t hard. There are seven billion people on the planet, so stopping my life for only one of them is ridiculous. Sure, it didn’t work out and it sucks because I loved you, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to waste any of my precious energy mourning an inadequate relationship when there’s a whole world full of people just waiting to meet someone like me.
  8. I’m finally hopeful. My future no longer looks like a bleak set of arguments and makeup sex. The world is my oyster and I can finally look to it as having something great in store for me instead of an uphill battle to make something impossible work.
  9. I don’t need anyone to survive. The only thing I need to survive is my health, and now that I don’t have to deal with the stress of a bad relationship, it’s already looking up. The air in my lungs and the heart in my chest are all I need, and I got them, with or without a guy.
Angelica Bottaro has a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Trent University and an Advanced Diploma in Journalism from Centennial College. She began her career as a freelance writer in 2014, racking up bylines in The Good Men Project, MakeWell, LymeTime, YouQueen, and more. She eventually shifted her focus and began writing about mental health, nutrition, and chronic disease for VeryWell Health.

You can follow her on Facebook or check out her website at She also posts on Instagram @a.ct._b and Twitter @angiiebee.