I Tried To Make It Work But Being On My Own Started To Look So Much Better

It’s hard to give up on a relationship, especially when you thought you were in it for the long haul. You’re willing to do whatever it takes to make it work and you don’t think anything could change that… until something does. That’s what happened to me. One minute, I wanted more than anything for our relationship to work out and the next I was just done. Being free of you was infinitely more appealing, and even though I felt guilty about it at the time, I know now it was the right decision.

  1. It was too far gone to save. I’ve always had a lot of patience, especially when it comes to someone I care about, but too many lines were crossed and too many things were pushed under the rug. The work it would take to get back to a good place seemed insurmountable and I just didn’t care enough to try anymore.
  2. You needed too much from me. Being in a relationship is about supporting each other no matter what, but it started to feel like you were relying on me way too much and I wasn’t getting much in return. I know relationships change and you have to be able to adapt, but we just weren’t on the same page anymore and I had little hope we ever would be again.
  3. I couldn’t help you. Believe me, I tried. You had issues you needed to deal with on your own and being with me was probably just holding you back from doing that anyway. You couldn’t see it, but once I stopped wanting to work on things, it wasn’t fair of me to stick around. You deserved someone who wanted to be there.
  4. Everything felt like an obligation. There came a point where making time to spend with you felt like something I was doing just being I was supposed to. I knew I’d have to walk on eggshells the whole time anyway and that’s no way to live. After all, should you really be trying to make it work when the thought of never seeing someone again is actually a relief?
  5. I didn’t want to do all the work. You were content to just solider on in your misery, never taking responsibility for things being less than perfect. If I wanted things to change, I would have to be the one leading the charge. To be perfectly honest, I just didn’t care to make that kind of effort.
  6. You stopped treating me with respect. For some reason, you started to act like I’d always be there putting up with your bad behavior. It took too long for me to recognize that I deserved more than what you were giving me and by that time, that only way I knew how to protect my own sanity was to leave. Fighting for an unhealthy relationship just ends up being a vicious cycle.
  7. Once the breakup ball started rolling, I couldn’t stop it. I could’ve changed my mind and committed to making things work, but the fact that it took me dumping you for you to realize things weren’t going well isn’t a good sign. Once I had one foot out the door, there was no way I was turning around and going back in. I’d tasted freedom and I wasn’t about to give it up.
  8. I wanted to be hopeful for the future again. Our future together looked like nothing but passive aggressive fights and wondering what you’d blame me for next. Why would I choose that when I could choose to be on my own? I knew then I could do better than what you had to offer.
  9. It was time to let go. I’d held on to a relationship that was going nowhere for too long already. I’m happy I got out without wasting any more time, so there’s nothing to regret.
  10. I was sick of you dragging me down. It’s not as if you were working hard to improve our relationship or yourself. Kind of like a chain can only be as strong as its weakest link, we were never going to be better than what you allowed. I’d rather be on my own than one half of an unhealthy relationship. I’m better than that.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to Bolde.com, contributes regularly to AmongMen.ca, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.