The Truth About Sleeping With A Guy Whose Package Was Way Too Big—It May Surprise You

It was certainly an experience—one that I wouldn’t necessarily hit the repeat button on. There was a lot that wasn’t good about it, and while I can’t say that my experience is the same as every other woman’s, I CAN say that big packages are overrated.

  1. It seriously hurt. There’s no way around it—it hurt like hell. I could feel my body tearing as he entered me initially and it didn’t get any better the further we went along. It wasn’t fun like getting down usually is; I was more trying to breathe through the pain and hope that eventually it would start feeling good. It didn’t. Instead, his package just seemed to be too large to fit inside my damn body. I couldn’t believe the size of it!
  2. It wasn’t fun for a one-night stand. One night stands are supposed to be super casual and easy breezy. You have lots of fun and just have a night of wild passion. When a big package was involved, it was way more complicated. I couldn’t have continuous intimacy without immense pain and it was just awkward for both of us when we had to talk about it or stop. It didn’t make for the super laid-back night of fun casual encounters can be.
  3. Bigger isn’t better when it’s huge. It’s funny because I think there’s this idea that bigger is always better. The idea is that big packages are super attractive and are going to feel great, but this just isn’t always the truth. Maybe packages that are large but not enormous feel good, but there’s a line that’s crossed when someone is giant.
  4. Lube maybe would have helped. Hindsight is 20/20, right? Now I realize that if we had lubricant, it may have been at least a little bit better. We could have lathered that stuff all over the place—on him and all over me. That may have prevented some of the raw feeling that I got from the dryness of the protection. Maybe next time I’ll be sure to use it. In fact, why don’t I have a stock of that stuff?
  5. I’m not sure any position would have been better. Ugh, my first thought is that the giant thing was going to hurt no matter what position we were in, but in further thinking about it, there may have been some positions that were more helpful than others. For example, maybe if I went on top, I could have controlled the depth of the penetration rather than allowing him to just jam it in me at whatever pace and depth he thought was good.
  6. Squeezing muscles makes it worse. Thinking about it, I probably made the tension worse because of my fear of the damn thing. I had anticipatory discomfort because when I’m tense I squeeze my body muscles and that makes me tighter. Whoops. Now I know that remaining calm and collected will help a whole lot in making sure that it doesn’t hurt so bad. I know to breathe and to keep my body loose.
  7. Going slow would have been better. We didn’t take our time at all. We were like the movies where we just ripped each other’s clothes off and went at it. I think we really would have benefited from pumping the brakes a bit and actually thinking about how to proceed. Again, hindsight is 20/20. Now I know that going slow in all aspects may make things better. Especially going slow when we’re starting entering me.
  8. Conversations are really important. I had an unfortunate experience where there was very little conversation and more just inserting right away. This resulted in a ton of pain when maybe we could have had a back and forth about the best course of action. More conversation is always better when it comes to intimacy and consent, especially when a giant package is involved.
  9. Maybe you get used to it, I don’t know. Perhaps there’s a point at which a woman gets used to a package so large. Maybe her body accommodates its size and that’s that. I guess I’ll know if I’m in a relationship with a dude who has a package that large. Continued intimacy may change things. Or, it may not. I just don’t know.
  10. I suppose we could have focused on the bit beforehand. If it was too much for me (which it was), we could have just gone down on each other and called it a night. There’s still a ton of fun to be had with just the beginning, especially if we still want to hook up even after discovering we can’t have full on intimacy. I didn’t have to force myself to do it and I also didn’t have to kick him out of the door. Maybe next time!
  11. Now I know I can stop at any time. One of the biggest problems with all of this was that I thought I had to keep going to please him. I know, it’s super sad. Now I realize that I should have stopped right when it hurt, which was immediate. I didn’t need to proceed beyond there and it didn’t matter what he thought of me. A kind guy would be totally OK with this.
Ginelle has been writing professionally for more than six years and has a bachelor’s degree in digital marketing & design. Her writing has appeared on Birdie, Thought Catalog, Tiny Buddha and more. You can follow her on Instagram @ginelletesta, via her Facebook page, or through her website at