I’m Very Honest And It Turns Guys Off

I don’t want to fake who I am in order to impress someone, so I’m brutally honest about who I am and how I feel. Unfortunately, that seems to put off a lot of dudes. I’m holding out for the person who appreciates me for me, but it’s starting to feel like it’ll never happen!

I don’t believe in lying. 

I won’t lie in any area of my life, including dating. If a man can’t handle the real me and if he’s not comfortable with my openness, then he’s not the guy for me. I don’t know why I haven’t found someone who can stand up next to me yet in his own honesty.

I think “making a good impression” is a waste of time. 

I don’t get the point. Why pretend to be smoother and cooler and fancier than I am for a few dates, only to reveal the truth eventually? If it’s going to come out anyway, might as well start with the truth. Apparently, no guy I meet feels the same way.

I’m not ashamed of who I am—why should I be?

 Life is too precious and short to waste time trying to be someone I’m not. If a guy doesn’t the real me, then he doesn’t get me at all. I don’t know why my candor is so intimidating but it seems to be.

I believe that if a guy can’t handle who I am, he’s not right for me. 

My truthful and open personality is a core element of who I am. Why would I ever end up with someone who didn’t appreciate that? I wouldn’t. I simply haven’t happened to meet the right guy yet so I’m rolling solo.

I don’t think it makes sense to wait to show my true self. 

Why does everyone worry so much about impressing someone else on a date? We all just want to be accepted for who we are, so why do we try so hard not to show who that is? I’m not down with that. I’d rather someone be impressed with my real self, not a made-up persona.

I won’t gloss over the darker parts of my past. 

Everyone has skeletons in their closets. I have some too. It’s nothing too terrible and I’m not embarrassed to talk about any of it. I would accept whatever truths any guy I dated wanted to share and I expect the same in return. I don’t have much success with this though.

I think it’s better to know it’s not right than get involved and find out too late. 

It sucks getting disappointed over and over again because men aren’t down with my truthfulness, but it doesn’t suck as much as falling for someone who doesn’t like who I really am.

I want that same honesty in return. 

I only want someone who’s comfortable being honest and open with me as well. The problem is that most people don’t like to be emotionally vulnerable, and so I’m still searching for that special guy who can go there with me.

I don’t keep quiet if something bugs me. 

That’s not who I am. I have opinions and feelings and I’m going to call out whoever I’m dating on his BS. I expect the same back, but no dude that I meet wants to engage in that way. I refuse to muzzle myself just so I can be with someone who doesn’t love me as my true self.

I know what I want and don’t want and some guys don’t like that. 

I’m not going to pretend to be ambivalent or wishy-washy just to stroke a man’s ego. If he can’t handle the fact that I’m a strong and independent woman, he’s clearly not going to like me. So far, I haven’t found anyone who wants to date me who is also cool with my candor.

I have opinions, feelings, and thoughts and I won’t suppress them. 

I’m a feminist and strongly believe that all people are created equal. I know that I have a brain and I’m not afraid to use it. If my intelligence, my personality, or my opinions threaten a man, then so be it. I won’t lie, though—it’s a bummer to find out that they’re almost always threatened.

I don’t know where the guy who gets me is hiding but I haven’t found him yet. 

I would love for him to come along, trust me. As comfortable as I am in my independence and as staunchly committed as I am to my standards, it gets lonely sometimes. I wonder if the guy who isn’t bothered by my openness even exists, but I’m trying to keep the faith anyway.

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