I Want A Boyfriend But I Really Don’t Want To Share My Bed

I’m on the lookout for a boyfriend, but there’s one thing holding me back: I really want to keep my bed to myself and would consider it a pretty big sacrifice to share it with someone. I know it sounds silly but it’s true.

  1. I’m a really light sleeper. Ever since I was a little kid, I was always a light sleeper. My little sister’s alarm clock used to go off and I’d be able to hear it even though I was asleep on the other side of the house. Any noise, movement, or breeze will wake me up and having a boyfriend beside me will be a guarantee of not getting a good night’s rest.
  2. My favorite sleeping pose is the starfish. I’ve taken to sleeping with my limbs all spread out, flat on my stomach. It’s so comfortable and feels so good to stretch out. Ever since I’ve discovered this new way of sleeping, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to go back to the fetal position.
  3. I like sleeping in a tangle of sheets and blankets. I like to wrap myself up like a mummy when I sleep, so I kinda need all the sheets and blankets to myself. Don’t ask why I do this—it’s just habit that I’ve picked up. I feel secure with the blankets all wrapped tightly around me. If a guy started sleeping over, I’ll probably have to invest in a second duvet.
  4. I suffer with bouts of insomnia. It really sucks, but there are some nights when I just can’t sleep. I’ll be like a zombie the next day because I didn’t fall asleep until 6 a.m. and I’ll still have to go to work even though I feel like I’m going to pass out. I never know for sure when these episodes of insomnia will happen, so I don’t think sleeping in the same bed as someone else would be a good thing.
  5. I do more than just sleep in my bed. My room isn’t that big, so a lot of my activities are done on my bed. I read, write, and watch TV on my bed, so there’s not a lot of room for someone else. I keep all kinds of weird things on there. I even keep my folded laundry on there when I’m too lazy to put it away, so there’s only really room for one person.
  6. I’m weird about cleanliness. I shower at night because I don’t want germs or whatever else I’ve picked up from the city during the day to end up in my bed. I don’t want to force someone to shower before getting into bed because I know that not everyone is weirdly obsessive like that. So it’s probably better that I just don’t share my bed at all.
  7. It’s not that big. It’s a double bed so there’s JUST enough room for two people. I really want a boyfriend but I’m not ready to give up my space just yet! I’ve gotten too used to being able to spread out and am currently loving it.
  8. Knowing someone else is in my bed makes it harder for me to fall asleep. I have this weird thing where I think I’m going to roll over in my sleep and crush the other person’s hand. It’s totally illogical because there’s no way I’ll actually crush someone’s hand, but it’s something I think about for some reason.
  9. I’d be tempted to just stay up and talk all night. I was always the last person to shut up during sleepovers. Remember sleeping on your best friend’s floor and staying up until 4 a.m., staring at the ceiling and talking about whatever comes to mind? I would totally do that if I had someone laying beside me and I wouldn’t get ANY sleep.
  10. I get hot easily. I sleep wth a fan on because of the white noise AND to stay cool (obvi). Even in the winter, I like to sleep with the fan blowing right on me because when I get too hot, my heart starts pounding and then I can’t get to sleep. I don’t think having another body in bed will help my temperature issues.
  11. Once I’m up, I’m up. If my BF got up before me, I wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep. As I said earlier, I’m a light sleeper, so having different sleep schedules would be a total and utter disaster and will take away a lot of my sleep time.
  12. I don’t know how people fall asleep in each other’s arms. I need to be completely on my own and touching no one to fall asleep. I feel safer that way, knowing that I can stretch in any direction without worrying about hitting someone. I like to cuddle but find it hard falling asleep that way because I’m constantly waking up at every twitch or movement my partner makes.
Jennifer is a playwright, dancer, and theatre nerd living in the big city of Toronto, Canada. She studied Creative Writing at Concordia University and works as a lifestyle writer who focuses on Health, B2B, Tech, Psychology, Science, Food Trends and Millennial Life. She's also a coreographer, playwright, and lyricist, with choreography credits for McMaster University’s “Spring Awakening,” “Roxanne” for the Guelph Contemporary Dance Festival, and “The Beaver Den” for The LOT, among others.

You can see more of her work on her Contently page and follow her on Instagram @jenniferenchin.