If You Want To Lose Your Mind, Date Two Guys At Once

If You Want To Lose Your Mind, Date Two Guys At Once ©iStock/Jovanmandic

When you’re actively dating but not in a relationship, it makes sense to think that you may end up talking to more than one guy at a time — you’re not technically with any of them, so you can do whatever you want and have fun. But sometimes juggling two guys isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. In fact, it can way more trouble than it’s worth and actually make you lose your damn mind.

  1. You’ll never know how you really feel. You’ll basically be on a 24/7 roller coaster ride. One minute you’ll lean towards one guy, and the next, you’ll like the other one more. It’s hard to know how you actually feel, and you’ll just confuse yourself more every time you think about it.
  2. You’ll be stressed to the max. Juggling two guys means juggling two text message conversation histories and your calendar, too. Oh yeah, you also have a super busy day job. If you want to have constant high blood pressure and feel anxious all the time, this is the way to do it.
  3. You’ll have no time for yourself. Alone time is super important, especially when you’ve just started dating a new guy. You want to keep your old life so you don’t give everything up for them. Good luck having any time alone at all when you’re dating two guys at the same time. You’ll always be hanging out with one or the other.
  4. You’ll feel like you’re cheating when you’re not. It’s hard not to feel like you should just go ahead and pick one of them already, even when you’ve only gone on a handful of dates and it’s not time to get serious yet. You’ll think of yourself as a cheater, even though you’re not doing anything wrong.
  5. You’ll feel super shady. You know you’re just doing what any single woman who wants to find the right guy is doing. Yet you can’t help but feel like a criminal. You’ll hate it and miss the simpler days of dating one guy at a time.
  6. You’ll wonder if they’re doing the same. What if each guy is dating two girls right now? What if every guy you’ve ever been with was dating a bunch of people at the same time? Is monogamy a total lie? Your brain is going to ask all sorts of confusing questions and it won’t be fun at all.
  7. You’ll wonder if you even know what you want. Before, you were super clear about wanting a serious relationship, but now that you’ve seen how tough it is to date a bunch of people casually, you’re questioning everything. Maybe you should just stick to your single life and be with Netflix instead.
  8. You’ll lose both of them. In the end, you won’t have two potential boyfriends to choose from but none at all, and you’ll be right back where you started. If you’re dating two guys, you’re not focusing on either one of them, and you’re not taking the time that you need to figure out if someone is right for you. If the point of dating is to find a true relationship, this is basically the worst thing in the world to do. So stick to seeing one guy at a time if you want to keep your sanity.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.