I Want Love But There’s Legitimately No Room In My Life

It’s an unfortunate conundrum: while I would love to have a healthy, happy relationship, I’m simply not in a place in my life where I can do so. I have so much that I want to accomplish, and I just can’t make room for a man. I know that I’ll be disappointed in myself if I compromise my goals for love, so I’d rather stay single until I actually have the time and energy for a real relationship.

  1. I have multiple jobs. As I juggle paying my bills with pursuing a developing career, it’s a necessity. I need flexibility in order to get where I want to go, so I work a few part-time jobs. I love my unorthodox schedule and have no intention of working a 9-to-5. It’s just not me. But all those responsibilities do take up a lot of time, and right now, they have to take priority over my love life.
  2. When I’m not working, I’m pursuing my dreams. It’s still work, but I don’t make much money doing it, so I keep the day jobs. I’m always working towards something, whether it’s money to keep myself going or building my writing career so I can someday live off of that instead. I want to be successful at something I enjoy, even if that means making a few sacrifices in my dating life.
  3. I have tons of friends. How can I make room for a man when I hardly even see my girls? I love them and it’s so difficult to spend quality time with them now. If I add a relationship into the mix, it’ll get even worse. I can’t stand it when girls disappear from my life because they get boyfriends, and I don’t want to be one of those people.
  4. I’m close to my family. They don’t live here, but that means that I have to take trips to visit them. It also means that I spend a good deal of my spare time talking to them. I won’t give up communication with my family to call a man instead. I have my priorities straight.
  5. I’m very physically active. I’ve always been very active, and I’m now training in an athletic teaching position. I commit at least a couple hours almost every day to physical fitness, whether it be yoga, hiking, running, or another form of exercise. This is a large chunk of time but it’s crucial to me.
  6. I’m learning a language. One of my resolutions for this year is to teach myself Spanish. Learning a new language is no small undertaking, especially when I’m already this busy. I’m determined to do it, and I won’t abandon my plans for a guy. I want to be able to communicate when I travel to Central or South America.
  7. I have a myriad of interests. There are so many different activities that I enjoy. I can’t possibly cram them all into my life, but I try pretty hard. While I would love a partner in crime, it’d be hard to find a guy who could keep up with all the stuff I want to do. My interests are all over the board, and I won’t abandon them for anyone.
  8. I highly value my sleep. I am the kind of girl who needs her eight hours. I wish I weren’t, but it’s just a fact of life. I don’t function well on much less. I know that if I try to fit a relationship into my already extensive list of commitments, I won’t get enough rest. If I’m tired and crabby, I’ll be a terrible girlfriend anyway.
  9. I volunteer. In addition to everything else, I volunteer and I’m very active on the political front. It’s of utmost importance to me that I give back to the world. I will do this no matter what, and I cannot let any guy distract me from my priorities. Helping people means everything to me.
  10. I value my independence more than I want a man. It really comes down to this: I’m not willing to compromise my very full and happy life for a relationship. Perhaps someday a guy will come along who changes all that, but I don’t know that I’ll ever want to give up any part of my life. I love having my freedom and pursuing exactly what I want to do.
A former actress who has always loved the art of the written word, Amy is excited to be here sharing her stories! She just completed her first novel, and is also a contributor for Elite Daily, Dirty & Thirty, and Thought Catalog. Amy is the founder of What If Journey and can be found on Twitter @amyhorton18. You can also visit her website at amyhorton.net.