All I Want Is For One Guy To Prove To Me That Not All Guys Are The Same

It’s pretty frustrating to be single and dating today. I try my best to keep an open mind and not pre-judge guys before I get to know them, but unfortunately they seem to act in super similar ways. All I want is for one guy to prove to me that not all guys are the exactly the same. I know they’re not deep down, but it’d be nice to have some concrete proof that my faith in men isn’t in vain. Here’s why I don’t think that’s too much to ask:

  1. Being so vague is lame. I’m pretty tired of guys who think that not showing how they feel is super cool. They’re okay with texting me every once in a while, but when it comes right down to it, nothing ever happens between us because they can’t admit that they like me. It’s lame to be vague and it would be nice if one guy could finally be honest about this. I truly believe that eventually guys will get just as sick of this because if they can’t own up to their feelings, they’re going to be alone forever.
  2. Actual relationships exist. It’s not like there are no relationships in the entire world. They clearly exist and people obviously find each other, like each other, and start seriously dating. So since it’s not that crazy of a concept to think that I could find a boyfriend sometime in this century, I think that there’s one guy out there who wants a girlfriend too.
  3. It just takes one. I don’t need ten different boyfriends. Since I can barely go on a good first date, that’s probably not super realistic. It just takes one guy to sweep me off my feet (in a totally normal and modern way, of course) and so he must be worth waiting for. He just has to be.
  4. Not all women are the same. My best friends and I are all pretty different. We have different careers, dreams, goals, hobbies, even diets. It’s crazy to think that all women are the same and date the same way, so why would I think that every single guy is going to act the same way? Despite evidence pointing in that direction, I totally believe that someday, someone is going to prove me totally wrong.
  5. I’ve seen it firsthand. It’s not that every guy I’ve gone out with is a total jerk and loser (although some of them are). Some of them have been perfectly decent people — just not the right ones for me. Since I’ve seen actual nice guys firsthand, I know it’s possible and that’s a powerful motivator to keep trying to find love, even when the whole dating part sucks.
  6. Some of my friends have found legit guys. While most of my friends are single, some of them are in happy and in love with guys that are definitely not the same as the rest. They managed to ask my friends out and actually sustain a relationship. and that’s saying something today.
  7. I’m not being crazy. Wanting a guy who is different — who is polite, funny, and actually knows how to act like a human being — is not a crazy thing. It’s pretty normal, actually. So since I know that I’m not asking for the moon and the stars here, I’m pretty confident that it’s possible to meet someone like this.
  8. Respect isn’t a new concept. I can’t believe the single guys out there who can’t figure out how to be respectful towards women, and I know I’m not the only one. But the thing is that respect isn’t a new concept. It’s seriously old-school and it’s not that difficult. So it can’t be that impossible for every guy out there.
  9. I’ve gotten close. The guys that I call my ex-boyfriends stood out from the crowd of jerks (or I wouldn’t have dated them, of course). Sure, things didn’t work out, but I know that I’ve been close to discovering the kind of guy that I want to be with long-term. So if I’ve gotten that close, I can definitely keep going and get it right this time.
  10. I don’t want to be bitter. There’s a fine line between being a confident woman who is comfortable with my solo status… and feeling super bitter about not finding anyone special yet. Like anything else in life, this is a choice and it’s something that’s within my control. I don’t want to be bitter and so I’m not going to be. I’m going to believe that someday soon, I’m going to meet a guy who’s everything that I’ve been looking for… and nothing like the others I’ve come across.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.