I’ve Wasted Too Much Time On Guys Who Play Games & I’m Over It

I want to find love, but not if doing so means dealing with a guy who screws with my mind and my heart. I’m a grown woman who’s looking for a real relationship and I don’t have any more time or patience for liars, players, and toxic guys who only want to play games.

  1. I’m ready for a real relationship and won’t accept anything less. I’m done with keeping things casual and with putting up with undefined relationships. I don’t want to be “almost” together. I’m not going to act the part of the girlfriend if I don’t get to actually be one. Guys who hold off on a real relationship are sending me a message—they’re not taking me seriously, and that’s why I’m dead serious when I tell them goodbye.
  2. If a guy can’t text me back, he’s obviously not that interested. I’m not going to play phone tag with some guy. If he actually likes me then he’ll text me back. I’m done with BS excuses about how he’s simply “too busy” to text. It only takes a few seconds to send a message and I’m not asking for an instant reply. If a guy’s going to leave me hanging for days, then when he finally gets around to text me back, I’ll have already lost his number.
  3. I’ve wasted enough time already. I’ve been with all the wrong guys, but now I’m ready for the right one. I’m too old to play games or to put up with drama. I want something that’s simple. I want things to fall in order naturally without any struggle to just be with a guy. I’ve had my fun dating, but now I’m ready to finally settle down.
  4. I won’t date any more guys with commitment issues. At this point, guys with commitment issues can cry me a freaking river. If a guy isn’t prepared for being in a relationship then why is he even dating? He needs to get out the dating scene and work on himself rather than making girls like me fall for him when he’s utterly unavailable. I’m done with this game. A guy needs to either fix himself or quit dating, but he can’t keep leading women like me on.
  5. I’m breaking all the rules. I just want to be me. I don’t want to have to wait three days to hear from a guy or be benched because I dared to double text him. I’m done with guys putting all kind of rules and stipulations on a relationship. Falling in love doesn’t have to be that hard. From now on, I’m not obeying all the dating rules or etiquette—I’m going to just be me and that’s how I’ll find a guy who doesn’t need games and just likes me for exactly the girl that I am.
  6. I’m done with mixed signals. If I can’t tell how a guy feels then I’m out. Or, even if he does say how he feels but his actions say otherwise, I’m still out. I don’t want to have to analyze his feelings for me on a daily basis. I want to feel safe and secure in a relationship. I’m done having guys mess with my heart.
  7. I shouldn’t have to teach a guy how to treat me right. If knowing how to treat a woman right doesn’t come naturally, then in my opinion, the guy’s just not that interested. If he were, he would automatically treat me how I deserve because he’d care about my happiness. Guys who claim there’s a learning curve to relationships are just players who want to take the easy way out rather than actually making an effort. No thanks.
  8. I don’t want to be with a man who doesn’t know how he feels. If he can’t even figure out his feelings for me then how will I ever be confident in our relationship? I’m always going to be self-conscious about whether he really loves me or is just settling for me. I want a man who knows without a doubt that he loves me. I want to be the right girl, not the girl that he goes back and forth with debating how he feels. I don’t need the worry or the stress of a man who’s not sure he’s into me.
  9. I’m only going to date guys who know how to make time for me. If a guy is too busy to see me then I’m not going to wait around for him to finally take a real interest. I won’t put up with a guy who only hits me up when he’s bored or horny and spends the rest of his time ignoring me. Either he makes me a priority from the beginning or I won’t waste a second more of my precious time on him.
  10. I just want someone who’s going to love me the way I deserve. If a man really likes me, he won’t be afraid to show it. He won’t play with my emotions because he would never want to jeopardize what we have. That’s the kind of man I deserve. That’s the kind of love I deserve. No more playing with my mind or my heart, no more wasting time, just lay all the cards on the table and be real.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.