There Are Ways To Attract Guys Who Are High Quality And Bring No BS To Your Life

If you’re sick and tired of dating the same old toxic guys, maybe the problem is that you’re attracting them without realizing it. Here’s how to replace them with great guys who are BS-free.

  1. Pretend you’re your BFF. You know how you care about your bestie and wouldn’t dream of setting her up with a nasty guy? Give yourself the same love by steering clear of guys who you know in your gut are all wrong for you. Yes, you know that your intuition is never wrong! Trust that feeling instead of trying to make an average relationship work with a loser guy because it’ll never fail you.
  2. Be your own boyfriend. You need to treat yourself the way you want men to treat you. If they see that you treat yourself badly, they’ll think it’s an open door to do the same to you because you’ll accept it. By treating yourself with kindness and respect, you show quality men that you’re available and they’d better treat you well.
  3. Know what you wantIt sounds simple to say you should know what you want, but are you sure you’re not giving men mixed messages? Have a clear idea of what you want in a partner and relationship, and don’t compromise on this. Say what you feel instead of hiding your truth —that won’t get you the quality guys, just the fools. When you know what you want, you’ll attract men who also know what they want, losing the confused AF guys who just waste your time.
  4. Reset your maps. Dating’s all about location! Where are you meeting guys? Forget about the shady bars and clubs where you meet drunk, annoying guys and go someplace different. Sign up for volunteer work or go to a gym on the other side of town. If you’re always in the same places, you’ll never meet someone different.
  5. Date out of your box. If you’re always ending up with guys who are selfish and toxic, maybe you need to change your type from “bad boy” to “good man.” Hey, give it a try and see what happens. Date loads of other guys you never gave a chance to while you’re at it. You can’t get better results if you keep doing the same thing.
  6. Have a life. Don’t make finding the perfect guy your MO—you have loads to live for and feel excited about. Enrich your life without a man in mind, and you know what’ll happen? A quality guy will see that you’re well-rounded, interesting, and attractive AF. No one wants to be with someone who wants to make a relationship their entire life—it’s creepy and attracts toxic, codependent guys.
  7. Keep your worth somewhere you can see it. You’re a worthy person who deserves quality love. Write down why you’re so amazing and put this list somewhere you can see it so you don’t forget about your standards. When guys don’t give you the love you need, that list will remind you to toss them out. The right guy will value your worth because he’ll also have high standards.
  8. Stop playing games. When a mature, quality man wants to date you, he’s going to be clear about his intentions. So lose the games—they’re for the man-child who doesn’t know how to handle a real woman.
  9. Don’t feel the need. Yes, you want a great man, but you don’t actually need him. If you’re sending out vibes that you can’t be happy without your perfect guy, quality guys will sense this desperation and turn away from you.
  10. Kill the drama. If you want guys who don’t bring drama to the table you have to ensure that you’re not cooking some of your own! Like attracts like. Leave your baggage, insecurities, and issues in the past where they belong so they don’t ruin your game.
  11. Be what you are. It sounds cheesy, but don’t underestimate how important it is to be yourself in the dating scene. How else are you going to attract a guy who’s on the same level as you are, and with whom you can find real happines if you’re trying to be something you’re not?
  12. Keep your needs around. If you get with a guy who’s toxic and selfish, he’ll ignore your relationship needs. Screw that. You need to enter first dates with your relationship needs in mind. When guys see that you prioritize your happiness, they get the message that they’ve got to be pretty amazing for you to make space for them. You’re not just going to roll over and make them the star of your life. You’re the star.
  13. Don’t lose your power. Even though some men are intimidated by powerful, strong women, that doesn’t mean you need to be weak in order to attract a man. Never do that! A quality man is powerful himself, so he’ll be able to value what makes you bold.
  14. Be cool on your own. If you can be single and happy, you’ll realize that you can take care of yourself and live a complete life without the need for a relationship. But you’ll also bring more quality men into your life because when you’re comfortable in your skin, confident, and independent, you’re intriguing AF.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.