Love languages are so rich and experience-based that there’s so much to learn with every relationship you’re in because everyone is different. That’s the beauty of this thing called life — you get to experiment. Many guys don’t necessarily feel comfortable expressing their feelings verbally and instead prefer to convey their affection via their actions. Here are just some of the ways guys tell you they love you without saying anything at all.
- They’re great at gifts. But not the kind of grand gesture public, “hey, everyone, look at what I got for my partner!” gifts. No. I’m talking “picked up a jar of peanut butter on the way home because you saw we were out and you know how I love peanut butter.” You know the type. Sometimes they’ll surprise you with a well-thought-out, well-researched gift that represents a more long-term quality to the relationship. They know you and they know what you need — and what you won’t get for yourself. It’s not that they know you better than you know yourself, it’s just that they care enough to ask.
- They give great compliments. This is one of the more obvious ways guys tell you they love you. Because you feel safe and intimate with your partner, they express their love in a subtle way. They know what you’re insecure about or what bothers you about yourself. Not only that, but they support you through words of affirmation and love. They help you treat yourself better and love your life. These are the kinds of compliments you end up remembering at the end of the day. “I love how you spend time with your family” or “You’re so generous in how to train up the new employee at your work.” “You look nice today” feels good for an hour, but then you forget in the wake of stress and anxiety that filled an average day. They know you and they know what you value in moments like this.
- They encourage you to be the best version of yourself. Confidence is hot, whoever you are. So is ambition. Being with a person who pushes you and understands your goal is a wonderful thing. Putting a person out of their comfort zone is an expression of love and trust, even if they don’t say the word. Even if you don’t understand your partner’s goals, putting in the time and effort to learn about them is most of the gesture itself.
- They’re not scared of your success. Ah, here is a man willing to learn and relearn how he operates with toxic masculinity. If anyone makes you feel less than or holds you back, I don’t care what they say, they don’t love you. It’s not real if they’re that easily made jealous. It might seem weird that being happy for your accomplishments and acting as your biggest cheerleader would be a way guys tell you they love you without words, but it’s definitely true.
- They’re willing to grow. We all need to grow together in relationships, to relax and trust each other and love one another enough to make mistakes and look stupid. You learn so much from your mistakes and you have to let yourself make them in the first place. It resituates your perspective on life.
- They respect you. There are so many ways you can tell if a guy respects you. He might respect you without loving you, but it’s impossible to love someone without respecting them. He should ask you interesting questions, encourage you to join him in this life as equals. If his comfort in the relationship relies on a power dynamic or pushing you down to inflate his ego, that’s just not love.
- They do chores without being pestered. I know the bar is on the floor but bear with me. No one really wants to do chores, I get that. Women aren’t just naturally better at household tasks, we just historically have ended up doing them. Men who don’t make a fuss or unnecessary comments about that are to be appreciated. They have more to prove than just not actively being an ass, but it’s a good start. You don’t feel like you’re fighting to just get some dishes done.
- They plan vacations. They know what you want and how you relax. If this guy makes it happen, you appreciate that. It doesn’t have to be a huge, expensive holiday. It just shows that he cares.
- They still surprise you. Relationships aren’t all firecrackers of flaming passion all the time. That’s not sustainable. You shouldn’t expect it to, but their surprising gestures ensure that you don’t get stuck in a rut. It’s enriching and you learn new things. They love you when they trust themselves to try new things.
That’s how you know that a guy loves you. He won’t always say it with words, but there are so many ways you can read it in how he behaves with you.
