What Every Mature Woman Wants In The Dating World

There comes a time when a woman enters that stage of her life where she’s willing to be single forever rather than put up with the crap that childish partners bring to the table. New standards for relationships begin to emerge because as we evolve and become more experienced with what definitely doesn’t work for us, we begin to know for sure what we do want and what we’re not willing to sacrifice. Here’s what every mature woman is seeking in the dating world.

  1. A partner who means what they say This is different to communication because anyone can communicate something, but it could also easily be a lie. Sometimes people tell us what we want to hear because it’s the path of least resistance. But someone telling us something because they mean it and will do it (like that they’ll see us again or help us in an area we’re struggling with) really goes a long way in a relationship because it starts to develop a deeper trust. Every mature woman wants the person she’s dating to be a person of their word.
  2. Reciprocation How many times have you gone above and beyond for somebody else only to be left disappointed when they won’t do the same for you? It is “won’t do the same” for you instead of “don’t do the same for you” because it is a choice as to how someone decides to treat you. They’ve decided they know they’ll get away with not putting as much time and energy into you. Instead, it’s time to not let this slide and make it the key factor in finding a partner. As a mature woman, finding someone who doesn’t show up for you as much as you do for them isn’t really finding a healthy dating relationship, it’s finding unhappiness.
  3. Someone with their own hobbies and interests It’s great when you can do things together in a relationship but even better when you can do things apart and have interesting conversations about the different things you’re learning and doing. Not only does this help maintain independence but it allows you and the other person to teach each other new things. It’s attractive when someone is passionate about their interests even if it’s worlds away from what you’d consider doing. No mature woman wants to be dating someone who lacks individuality.
  4. The ability to talk about problems If you’re unhappy in a relationship or dating phase, it’s important to speak out early. The reaction to this by a partner or someone you’ve been on a date with is everything in terms of how they handle conversations and what they aim to do in the future. You quickly see if the person you’re thinking about spending more time with is mature enough to handle deeper issues and sort them out rather than telling you to stop causing drama. They should never make you feel as though you’re asking for too much by wanting to be proactive.
  5. Physical attraction You may not want to jump someone’s bones right away, but getting to know their true personality, sense of humor, and the way they treat others can blossom into physical attraction that wasn’t necessarily there at the start. People look better when they appear to be genuinely enjoying themselves in whatever situation and when they’re kind to hospitality staff and other people (sometimes for no obvious reason), this can set a mature woman’s heart racing because at this point, we know dating isn’t about society’s ideas of good looks but your own.
  6. A challenge This sounds counter-intuitive as the word ‘challenge’ implies it will already be an uphill battle. However, this isn’t about being tested in a negative way. Rather, it’s about being pushed out of your comfort zone and encouraged to question your preconceived notions so you can continue to grow into your best possible self. A good partner will respectfully disagree with you if you don’t see eye to eye on certain topics and may even push you in a good way to try new things or open your mind to other possibilities. As a mature woman, you should be dating someone who ticks this important box.
  7. Encouragement Overly positive people can be very annoying, but it’s even worse when someone is always negative. Constant pessimism isn’t helpful in a relationship or in life in general. You need someone who can always see the silver lining and who encourages you to go for your dreams because they truly believe you can achieve them. As a mature woman, you need someone who still has a childlike wonder about the world and isn’t jaded enough to believe that anything is out of reach.
  8. A partner who doesn’t need babysitting You’re looking for an equal partner, not a child in adult’s clothing who needs babysitting on a daily basis. You shouldn’t need to tell someone to do the laundry or to perform any basic task that requires minimal effort. You didn’t enter a relationship to become a mother to a grown person, so ditch the metaphorical diapers and leave them with their own s–t to deal with.
  9. Financial literacy If you’re always reaching for your credit card and paying for someone else or you don’t know much about your mortgage and other living expenses, this is a problem. It’s important for a relationship to be balanced in terms of finances. While one person may make more money than the other, it’s still vital to be educated as to how to look after your own income and expenses. A relationship should allow you to explore expanding your financial knowledge. This way, if there comes a time when you’re no longer in a relationship, you won’t be suddenly shocked by empty pockets. A mature woman shouldn’t even entertain the idea of dating someone who doesn’t have their financial act together.
  10. Someone who will help lift you up (instead of crushing you) If you make more money than someone, have accomplished some amazing things, and are generally thriving in life, this should be celebrated instead of being kept quiet. It’s not your responsibility to assauge someone’s jealousy or stroke their ego. In a relationship, being happy for someone else’s success drives the same in the other person. A mature woman wants the person she’s dating to be able to celebrate her wins with her.
Cynthia likes to share stories and advice via writing and podcasting, especially when it comes to society's overbearing standards in regards to specific timelines and goals for women i.e. get married, have kids, blah blah blah...shut up.