What It’s Like Loving A Man You Know You Can’t Have

What It’s Like Loving A Man You Know You Can’t Have

Unobtainable crushes are the worst. Maybe he’s married. Maybe he’s your boss. Maybe he’s your best friend’s brother. No matter what the situation is, you know it would be wrong to go after him. That’s why it’s absolute hell loving a man you know you can’t have.

  1. You have to filter yourself. You can’t say the first flirty thing that comes to your mind, which is why it’s so hard to have a conversation with him. You’re always holding yourself back.
  2. Stalking him becomes part of your routine. You don’t want to stare at him when you see him in person, which is why you always check his social media pages. You’ve seen every status and picture he’s posted since he signed up for the site.
  3. You constantly fight the urge to text him. And to message him on Facebook. And to like his Instagram photos.
  4. You can’t gush about him to your friends. You’d feel a little bit better if you could tell your girlfriends about your huge crush, but then they’d judge you. You don’t want them to think you’re a bad person, so you keep your feelings to yourself.
  5. You can’t touch him the way you want to. You can’t have him in real life, but that doesn’t mean you can’t masturbate to the thought of him. Of course, thinking about him while you’re under the covers only makes you want him in “real life” that much more.
  6. You feel guilty for no reason. Even though you haven’t done anything wrong, you still feel a little bad about your feelings for him. You can’t help it, and honestly, sometimes that naughty feeling makes things even hotter.
  7. You wonder if you should risk it. You know you shouldn’t go after him, but that doesn’t stop you from daydreaming about what would happen if you did. On some days, you’re worried you might actually go through with it.
  8. You’re mean to overcompensate. You don’t want anyone to know that your crush is your crush, so when you talk to him, you might be a little rude. You’re just trying to throw him off course.
  9. You compare everyone to him. You’ve built him up in your mind so much that no one can compete with him. Everyone else pales in comparison.
  10. You wonder if you only like him because you can’t have him. At the end of the day, you’re not quite sure if you like him, because he’s a catch, or because he’s off limits. Sometimes, forbidden fruit looks the tastiest.
Holly is a science fiction and horror writer, who has recently been published by Flash Fiction Press, Infective Ink, and Popcorn Press. You can find more of her nonfiction articles on All Women Stalk, The Talko, and News Cult.