What Makes Alpha Females So Hot? These 10 Qualities Are Vital

Being an alpha female isn’t easy. They’re often misunderstood, labeled as bitches for their ambition, and can struggle to slow down the hectic pace they’ve set for their own lives. While their approach to life and love automatically sets them up for success, it’s also sexy as hell. Are you an alpha female? You are if you have these qualities.

  1. You like being in charge. You’re good at calling the shots. When others don’t know what to do, they turn to you for guidance and leadership and you rarely disappoint. When you’re in control, things usually run more smoothly for everyone involved. You know what you want and you know how to get it. Even when you’re faced with tough decisions, you’d rather be the one making them than the one who sits back and lets others make the decisions for her.
  2. You don’t apologize for your opinions. Some people (women especially) feel that they need to qualify their statements with phrases like “it’s just my opinion,” or “I could be totally wrong about this, but…” This is not an issue for you. You know what you believe and you understand that apologizing for something you care about only undermines your point. Speaking with authority comes naturally to you, and trying to seem less threatening by softening your opinions with qualifiers is not something you waste time on.
  3. Asking a guy on a date is no big deal. It’s the 21st century, so why should men still be the only ones making bold moves? If you’re interested in a guy, you feel perfectly comfortable being the first one to make an invitation. Asking men out has the added benefit of ruling out bad options quickly: the ones with fragile masculinity are put off by it and the ones who respect women are turned on by it. This weeds out a lot of undesirable partners from the beginning. It’s a win-win situation.
  4. You’re ruthlessly competitive. It doesn’t matter how arbitrary the activity—if you can turn it into a competition, you will. Whether it’s a supposedly friendly board game or holiday decorations, you can’t turn off your burning need to win, and you usually do. By now, most of your friends and family know better than to try to compete with you, but you couldn’t be happier when they do. The more competition, the better.
  5. Most men find you intimidating. It’s a sad fact of life that a lot of men are intimidated by strong women, even guys who think they’re confident. They often avoid showing interest because they’re afraid of being rejected, which sometimes leads you to believe that the guy you like just isn’t into you. But this is rarely true, and if you were to show him your interest, he’d be more than happy to reciprocate.
  6. You tell your partner what you need. When something isn’t satisfying in your relationship, you speak up. You know what you deserve and you don’t let resentment build out of fear of confrontation. Even when it’s difficult, you have a conversation about it because you know that it’s best to rip the band-aid off than to let the wound fester. This makes you an excellent communicator, and your relationships are stronger because of it.
  7. You aren’t afraid to say how you feel, even when it’s difficult. No matter how confident you are, telling people how you feel can’t always be a breeze, especially when you know the truth will hurt them. But just because you speak your mind doesn’t mean you lack compassion. It shows you respect yourself and the other person enough to bring your feelings into the open. Even when it hurts, you speak your truth.
  8. You’re incredibly ambitious. You’ve always had big dreams and you have plans to execute them. Whether your goals are career-oriented or simply based on personal fulfillment, you know you’re going places and the work required to get there is what really fires you up. The bigger the challenge, the greater your excitement and determination.
  9. Dominant men make you feel even more powerful. You like men who challenge you, and it takes a pretty strong guy to do that. When you meet a man who likes taking the lead and is full of confidence, you rise to the occasion instead of feeling like you have to make yourself smaller in order to accommodate his expectations of how women should be. Other people’s strength makes you stronger, and the guys who are truly confident find this sexy as hell.
  10. Your romantic relationships don’t define you. Some people get so wrapped up in their relationships that they forget all other aspects of their life, but you know how to keep perspective. Even in the midst of heartbreak, you know that your life is so much bigger than the person who broke your heart. No matter how heartbroken or in love you are, you know you will always have more to live for than any one relationship.
Rose Nolan is a writer and editor from Austin, TX who focuses on all things female and fabulous. She has a Bachelor of Arts in Theater from the University of Surrey and a Master's Degree in Law from the University of Law. She’s been writing professional since 2015 and, in addition to her work for Bolde, she’s also written for Ranker and Mashed. She's published articles on topics ranging from travel, higher education, women's lifestyle, law, food, celebrities, and more.
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