What Men Really Want In A Woman — The Answer Might Surprise You

Heterosexual relationships can be so confusing sometimes. What do men really want in a woman? While you might assume it’s all about big boobs and a tiny waist, there’s far more than physical appearance that goes into creating a successful, thriving, long-term relationship. Here are some qualities that guys look for when deciding on who they want to settle down with. Chances are, these are all things that matter to you as well.

  1. Support Doesn’t everyone want this from a partner? You want to know that no matter what happens — what goals you dream up, what challenges you face — that there’s someone right there behind you or even beside you pushing you forward, picking you up when you fall down, and reminding you that you’re not alone. It’s this support that helps you get through the toughest times and allows you to become the best version of yourself.
  2. Loyalty No one wants to worry that they’re going to be betrayed or abandoned by the person they love most. Men want to be with a woman they can trust. It’s not just about staying faithful/not cheating either. Loyalty is about having their back when an outsider seeks to take them down. It’s about staying dedicated to the relationship and willing to fight for it when things get hard between you.
  3. Space It should go without saying that men want a woman who is happy to give them space sometimes. You probably know by now that it’s not possible or healthy to spend 24/7 with your partner. You’re a couple, yes, but you’re also two individual people who had lives before you got together. Those lives shouldn’t just fall by the wayside simply because you’re in a relationship.
  4. Good sex Sex isn’t everything in a relationship, but maintaining strong physical intimacy is so important. Men want a woman who appreciates their sexual appetite (and matching it would be even better). They want someone who’s open to experimentation, who’s willing to initiate sometimes to make them feel wanted just as much as you like to feel wanted. It cannot be overstated just how vital this is to a strong partnership.
  5. Humor Sometimes life seriously sucks. Pandemics, world wars, family drama, work stress… there’s no limit to stuff that can bring you down in everyday life. That’s why the ability to laugh at yourself and at more ludicrous situations in life is so important. Men want a woman that has a good sense of humor, who’s able to see the lighter, brighter side of any situation. Who wouldn’t want that?
  6. Perspective It’s so easy to react to situations emotionally — or rather, to overreact to them. Most guys want to be with someone who’s able to take a step back from any given situation to assess it and respond accordingly rather than losing their cool at the smallest sign of trouble. The ability to see the bigger picture and to keep things in perspective is hard, but it’s well worth developing.
  7. Effort Yes, guys need to make the effort in a relationship to make sure you don’t feel unloved or taken for granted, but that goes both ways. Men want to be with a woman who knows that love is a two-way street and that it’s not always down to the guy to put in an effort. If you meet him halfway, he’ll be so much happier.
Jennifer Still is a writer and editor with more than 10 years of experience. The managing editor of Bolde, she has bylines in Vanity Fair, Business Insider, The New York Times, Glamour, Bon Appetit, and many more. You can follow her on Twitter @jenniferlstill