What Normal People Are Really Thinking About All Those Selfies You’re Posting

Ah, the selfie. Whether you’re for them or against them, you’re probably still guilty of taking at least one in your life. Once regulated specifically to millennials, taking selfies have become something that everyone does, and why the hell not? You have a phone, it has a camera, and you probably have time to kill.

While the psychology behind the selfie has been less than flattering (apparently, it makes you less likable), it’s not as though it’s going to stop any selfie-loving woman from taking them. But what exactly are you telling the world with all those damn selfies? Other than the fact that you think you’re Kim Kardashian? Here are 11 possible messages you’re putting out there.

  1. You’re full of yourself. Oh, yes, this is definitely a message many people read when you post selfie after selfie. Not that there’s anything wrong with being full of yourself, of course. Narcissists are usually fairly successful people, but you may want to be known for something else instead.
  2. You need the validation of others. If you’re not a narcissist, then you might be on the other end of the spectrum, and need to post all those selfies so you can feel good about yourself. Although, honestly, you shouldn’t depend on the feedback of strangers to realize you’re awesome.
  3. You’re desperate for attention. Whether it’s the need for validation from strangers, or something that runs deeper, lots of selfies scream out, “Look at me! I exist! PAY ATTENTION TO ME.”
  4. You wish you had an exciting life. Your friends are posting photos of their trips around the world, and you’re posting yet another selfie with some pouty expression that officially went out of style in 2012? It might be time to finally use those vacation days.
  5. You have a lot of time on your hands. Face it: No one takes just one selfie; it takes easily a dozen to get it right. A lot of people would kill for so much extra time, and here you are wasting it on photos of yourself … again.
  6. You’re missing out. If you’re too busy taking a selfie, you just might be missing out on an actual life moment that you can never get back. You’ll have people looking at your photo and thinking, “WTF? She’s at her sister’s graduation and she’s taking selfies instead of photos of her sister’s big day?”
  7. You should probably get out more. Posting selfie after selfie in your bedroom at home? You don’t just need a vacation, you need a life makeover.
  8. You definitely need a hobby. Not that taking selfies isn’t a hobby … it’s just a ridiculous one.
  9. You have a hard time relating to people. People who constantly hide behind technology, usually have a hard time to relating to people IRL. Your phone may be your constant companion, but it’s not exactly your friend.
  10. You’re a showoff. It’s one thing to post a selfie or two of how hot you look in a dress or how amazing your abs are these days thanks to Pilates, but when you do it incessantly, you’re just a showoff. No one likes a showoff.
  11. You’re mentally ill. A study found that two thirds of people who are constantly posting selfies actually suffer from Body Dysmorphic Disorder, so yeah … are you sure you want to keep posting all those selfies?
Amanda Chatel is a sexual health, mental health, and wellness journalist with more than a decade of experience. Her work has been featured in Shape, Glamour, SELF, Harper's Bazaar, The Atlantic, Forbes, Elle, Mic, Men's Health and Bustle, where she was a lifestyle writer for seven years. In 2019, The League included Amanda in their "15 Inspirational Feminists Every Single Person Should Follow on Twitter" list.

Amanda has a bachelor's degree in English and master's degree in Creative Writing from the University of New Hampshire. She divides her time between NYC, Paris, and Barcelona.

You can follow her on Instagram @la_chatel or on Twitter @angrychatel.