What Strong, Independent Women Need From A Partner

It can be hard us women who are used to being totally independent and doing everything our own way to find someone who complements us. When we’re trucking along at our own pace, finding a partner who doesn’t slow us down or hold us back can be difficult (especially in an age where dating usually just means texting and a lot of “chill + Netflix” nights). If you’re goal oriented, motivated, and know what you want out of life, finding someone who lets you have your space but also takes control of what they want out of their own life is important:

  1. They’ll have their own life and goals. It’s important that you find someone who knows who they are and who has their own interests, hobbies, and goals to keep them busy. You won’t always be around to keep him or her company and they’ll need to be able to function on their own.
  2. They’ll support you in your endeavors. Having a supportive partner is key in balancing a relationship and achieving your goals at the same time. There’s absolutely nothing more important than a partner always having your back.
  3. They’ll know when to leave you alone and when you need a hug. Neediness is not a quality that complements a strong, busy, goal-driven lady. Sometimes you need your space; that doesn’t mean that you won’t ever want affection or that at the end of a long day you won’t want someone to cuddle up next to, though. You partner has to know what’s too much and what’s not enough.
  4. They’ll be honest and never hold back from telling you how they feel. Honesty and communication are important in any relationship but strong women usually find no use for sugar coating or mincing words. Find someone who is direct and unguarded in their communication.
  5. They’ll be open about about their plans for the future. For example, if you’re not interested in having in children and your partner isn’t honest about their desire to have children in the future, your relationship will either fail or someone will have compromised their dreams (and that’s no good either.) You will both need to be honest about what you want out of life for everything to work and for you both to be on the same page.
  6. They’ll let you shine. You can’t date someone who constantly has to be the center of attention and who always steals your spotlight. A well-matched partner will be proud of you and will want you to succeed and have your shining moments. Don’t settle for someone who constantly has to one-up you or derail your success. Find someone who is okay with taking the backseat sometimes.
  7. They won’t shy away when things get rough. Relationships are not always easy and humans are not perfect beings. Your ideal match will understand this and will want to ensure that when things aren’t going as planned, there’s open communication lines about what should be done to help fix it. Running away, hiding, and avoiding confrontation doesn’t normally go over very well with strong ladies.
  8. Their intelligence and drive matches your own. It’s important to look for a partner who can keep up with you. You’ll need someone with whom you can match wits. You’ll want to bounce ideas off of them without those ideas going directly over their head.
  9. They’ll respect your hustle. They will understand that even though you’re both doing your own thing, you eventually come together as one. They’ll respect you more because you don’t depend on them for your ultimate happiness and fulfillment.
  10. They’ll love you unconditionally. Sometimes strong ladies with big personalities get mistakenly deemed “bitches.” Take Nicki Minaj’s quote for example: “When I’m assertive, I’m a bitch. When a man is assertive, he’s a boss.” Your ideal partner will understand that YOU are a boss and that you deserve only the highest of quality when it comes to relationships and your life in general. He or she will love you even more because of your assertiveness and confidence and want to support your dreams. Look for someone who will love all the different pieces that make up who you are.
Tiffany is a New Orleans-based boudoir photographer (lushboudoirla.com) and freelance writer. Follow her on instagram: @onesmallflower or view her boudoir photographs: @lushboudoir