What To Do On A First Date To Win Someone Over

First impressions are everything, or so they say. However, there’s no denying that a first date is important in determining the trajectory of a new relationship. If things go bad, it’s likely there won’t be a second date. But if things are good, then the two of you may be falling head over heels sooner than later. It’s important to be prepared ahead of a first date – both mentally and physically – so you can put your best foot forward. If you really want to wow someone, then follow these tips and you can be confident another date is in your future.

  1. Put In Effort To Look Put Together. You don’t need to spend a lot of time or money on your appearance before a first date, but you should put in some effort. Choose an outfit that makes you look and feel good – the confidence it brings you will be your best accessory. Similarly, do your hair and makeup in a way that makes you feel your best. Looking put together signifies confidence and self-care, qualities that are innately attractive in a potential partner.
  2. Choose The Location Wisely. Where you choose to have the first date is going to have a big impact on how smoothly things go. So, choose something you know the two of you will be comfortable with and will have a good time. Try asking him what sorts of activities he likes, and similarly, ask yourself what you’re most down for. If having long conversations makes you nervous, don’t suggest sitting down to dinner. But also, don’t choose an activity where you won’t have a chance to talk or get to know each other.
  3. Express Interest In His Life. You don’t need to have a ton in common with someone in order to click, but you’re not going to get far if you don’t express interest in his life. When he’s discussing himself, make sure to ask questions to convey your interest. You may not be interested in his career as an accountant or his passion for sports, but it’s important to let him know you like hearing what he has to say and want to get to know him better. And vice versa – he should also be inquisitive when you speak about yourself, otherwise, the first date may be a bust.
  4. Don’t Be Negative. You’re only going to want to go on a second date if the first one was enjoyable, so be sure not to bring down the mood. Someone who is overly negative is going to make a lasting impression, but not a good one. Keep things light-hearted and casual, especially if this is your first-time meeting in person. This means no complaining (even if your food tastes bad), bringing up past relationships or bad dates, bad-mouthing other people., and especially no talking down to the person you’re going out with.
  5. Be Intentional With Your Body Language. Even if you’re really into a guy, he may not get that impression if your body language is cold or unapproachable. It’s important to evaluate your behavior to ensure it aligns with how you’re feeling on the inside. Rather than crossing your arms, keep your body posture open. Be attentive when he speaks by making eye contact, keeping your body turned to him, and nodding your head. If you’re feeling the vibe, consider making light physical contact by touching his arm or brushing your leg against his. Of course, be respectful of his boundaries and make sure he’s okay with the body language you’re putting out.
  6. Remain Present In The Moment. One of the worst things you can do on a first date is be distracted. Avoid scrolling on your phone or responding to someone else, and don’t stare off into the distance or bring something up that’s on your mind but has nothing to do with him. Everyone has stressful and exciting things going on in their life, but you want to make the other person feel like they’re the only one in the room on a first date. You can’t achieve that if you’re giving your attention elsewhere, so make sure to remain present and focused on your date.
  7. Follow Up After The Date. If you want to ensure you’re on his mind even after the date has ended, then start a conversation with him. Find a way to reference your date to make it clear you had a great time and were listening to him – ask a follow-up question about something he said or make a joke about something funny that happened. Don’t reach out immediately after the date, like within an hour or even the same day. You don’t want to appear overbearing. Similarly, don’t demand to know when and if a second date is happening. Simply having a conversation post-date is a good sign that he’s interested in you, too.
  8. Be True To Yourself. If you have to pretend to be someone you’re not to win another person over, then you haven’t really won them – a fake version of yourself did. It’s important to be true to yourself on a first date so that the person gets to know the real you. Sure, you’re not going to want to reveal your deepest secrets or even burp loudly on a first date. But you should wear clothes that express your personality, talk about your passions, and be honest about your ambitions. It’s easy to see through people who are fake, so let him know that you want him to see the real you because you see this going somewhere.
Alexandra is a freelance writer in Montreal, Quebec. She enjoys shopping as a sport, Buffy the Vampire Slayer re-runs, and being a plant mom.