Have you ever broken up with someone and told yourself that you’d at least keep the friendship? If so, you were probably shocked with they blocked you on social media. It’s hard not to take being blocked personally, but it happens way too often after a breakup. Here’s how to handle it.
- Accept that this is their way of healing. Being blocked doesn’t mean that he or she has stopped caring about you. They just need to take a break from you or feel like they might not be able to handle themselves if they see your posts. This is a way for them to move on. It may not be forever, but you have to accept it for what it is.
- Don’t retaliate. Just because they blocked you doesn’t mean you should block them. Just ask yourself if you feel like you can look at their photos and updates the same way you could a friend or a guy you had a class with a few years back. Some people can’t and that’s okay. If you’re not the type of person to assume that every post is secretly about you and your relationship, you may want to keep things open.
- Remind yourself that there’s a difference between a block and an unfriend. Unfriending someone is serious. In order to see their updates again, you’ll actually have to go through the pain of friending them again. Features like muting and snoozing seem a lot less personal. If he unfriended you, think about whether or not you really hurt them during this breakup. Sometimes, it’s really easy for us to become too absorbed with our own views that we don’t realize how we’re coming off towards others. If you really destroyed things, consider sending an apology card. Just don’t expect him to take you back.
- Think about what you commonly share online. Are you an oversharer? Then, it’s possible that you got blocked because your ex doesn’t want to hear what you have to say about your breakup. Not everything needs to be explained online. Consider dumping the PR statement you were going to type up about the relationship and instead, call your best friend on the phone. Or, your mom if she’s your regular go-to. It’ll be a lot more comforting.
- Thank them for the time apart. Not to their face, but in your mind. If learning that you’ve been blocked makes you feel angry, channel that feeling into something better. Maybe it’ll give you a good feeling of distance. Or, maybe the act itself will make you realize they weren’t as great of a partner as you initially thought. In a way, a block can make you fully understand that the relationship is over and likely won’t recover anytime soon.
- Consider deactivating your account for a little bit. The good part about social media is that it can all easily come back if you change your mind and want to reactivate. Sometimes, it’s wonderful for our brains to take a break from Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok. It’ll lessen the distractions we go through while trying to process the break-up. And if you happen to have a gossipy group of friends who can’t help but tell you what your ex is doing or saying online, try not to feed into it. Use this break to heal.
- Don’t immediately delete all of the pictures you have together. Some people like to erase all aspects of their ex from social media. Others leave it up and just replace any featured images that may also include their ex. What you do is up to you. But just remember, don’t act on impulse. You may regret getting rid of those memories or making it look like you regret them. It’s okay to feel hurt right now. But, take a few weeks before you do anything too drastic online.
- Consider dusting off your online dating profile. As of right now, you’re single again. And while you probably don’t want to jump into another relationship right away, it’s healthy to look around and see who else is out there. You should remember to start slow. However, just searching again will make you feel really good about your romantic life that’s ahead. There’s no right time to officially move on, but it is a good start for your next chapter.