What To Do When You’re Suddenly Single Again But Have Forgotten How To Flirt

What To Do When You’re Suddenly Single Again But Have Forgotten How To Flirt ©iStock/Courtney Keating

So you’ve recently said goodbye to your long-term relationship and hello to the single life. Unfortunately, all that time you wasted on Mr. Wrong is preventing you from finding Mr. Right, and now you realize you have no idea how to flirt. Don’t worry — you’ll get your game back. You just have to remember how to play.

  1. Enlist your friends. All that time while you were cuddled up with your now ex-boyfriend, your girls were out playing the field. That means they’re your best source of information on the dating game. Let them coach you back to high-profile flirt or you’ll spend every bar night on the sidelines.
  2. Brush off the awkward. Don’t let one awkward moment ruin the whole flirtation. If you let your nerves get the best of you, you’ll never make it through the first introduction. The best way to diffuse a situation is to know how to laugh it off and move on.
  3. Know when to quit. If the conversation just isn’t flowing, maybe it’s just not right. You can’t force chemistry. No connection? No problem. There really are plenty of other fish in the sea, and one is bound to take your bait. The odds are in your favor, so throw the bad boys back and keep on fishing.
  4. Remember to smile. Sadly, your resting bitch face can be a little off-putting. When it comes to flirting, your smile do a lot of the work for you. Men are attracted to happy women, so put your best face (and attitude) forward and you’ll be sure to catch a keeper.
  5. Stay confident. You’ve got this. It may be a long time since you’ve been in the game, but that doesn’t mean you won’t remember how to play — you just need a little practice. The best way to get back to your natural flirt is to fake it ‘til you make it. When it comes to dating, a little confidence goes a long way.
  6. Find a wing woman. There’s nothing wrong with recruiting a little help. Your girls know you better than anyone else and they know how to talk you up. If you spy with your little eye someone special, bring your BFF with you. Not only will she be there to help you shine, she’ll also get her shot with his cute friend.
  7. Use your experience. Just because you don’t remember how to flirt doesn’t mean you’ve never done it. How did you land a boyfriend in the first place? That’s right, flirting. That relationship didn’t work out, and this time you want to do things differently — but every relationship starts the same way: with a single flirt.
  8. Don’t be afraid to initiate. Guys don’t have to do everything. If someone catches your eye, go for it. Waiting around for him to make the first move is just a waste of time. There are no rules here — you’re a strong, independent woman and if you want someone, go for it. It’s 2016. Live a little.
  9. Chill out. It’s honestly not that big of a deal. So stop acting like your entire future is riding on one conversation. A single flirt fest isn’t going to determine if you end up forever alone, so keep it cool.
  10. Get over your fear of rejection. Failure is a part of life. Just remember that if you don’t fail, you’ll never succeed. Every rejection teaches you something. You just have to remember not to take it so seriously. Sometimes people don’t click — you’re better off knowing it’s not right from the beginning than after three years of dating.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.