What To Expect After 6 Weeks Of Dating — Where You Should Be

A lot of people feel like they hit a wall a little over a month into a relationship. The initial thrill of being with a new person has worn off, but you’re probably not at the stage where you feel settled or completely secure. But where you are at this point tells you a lot about the longevity of the relationship. Here’s what to expect after 6 weeks of dating.

1. You know their communication style. By six weeks, you’ll know whether they’re good at keeping text conversations going, checking in throughout the day, or letting you know when there’s a change of plans. If you feel like they’re never giving you enough attention when you’re apart, now is a good time to decide if that’s a dealbreaker for you. It’s unlikely that their behavior will change at this point.
2. You should feel excited. While the first rush of infatuation will have declined by the time you reach six weeks, you should still feel starry-eyed and have butterflies in your stomach when you think of them. If you’re feeling indifferent by six weeks, imagine how you’ll feel in six months or six years. At this early stage in your relationship, you will be learning new things about each other. That deepening of understanding should fill you with excitement about the future and deep curiosity to learn more.
3. You know your sexual compatibility. Some couples wait more than six weeks before having sex, but plenty of others will have slept together enough times at this point to know how physically well-suited they are to each other. Sexual compatibility isn’t everything, but it is a crucial part of any romantic relationship, even the ones that don’t involve sex. By six weeks, you should feel comfortable, confident, and respectful of each other’s bodies.
4. You might not be official yet–don’t panic. You might be feeling impatient after six weeks of dating. Maybe you’ve been ready for a relationship since the third or fourth week of dating and are worried that your partner might not be as serious as you. But try not to overthink it yet. Studies reveal that it takes couples about three months to become exclusive on average. That’s twice as long as you’ve been together. Take a deep breath, and give your partner some time to develop their thoughts and emotions. Everyone moves at their own pace.
5. You should feel commitment. While you may not be a formally-recognized couple, you should feel commitment by six weeks. Your partner should make you feel important. The relationship should be a priority for both of you. By six weeks, you’ve invested too much time and energy to be passive. You should both be making an effort to spend time together, get to know each other more deeply, and consider the future.
6. You’re each other’s plus-one. You may not be completely official, but you go places together as an “item.” You’ve probably met some of each other’s friends at this point, and you go to parties together. You might even go to a few formal occasions together, such as weddings or dinner parties. You’ve stopped going solo to events. When you need a date, they’re your obvious choice and vice versa.
7. Red flags will be popping up. Six weeks is enough time to start noticing the red flags. You’ll be comfortable enough with each other to let your guard down. You might start to notice that your belief systems are incompatible. Maybe they exhibit sexist or controlling tendencies. Maybe they’ve started to hint that they aren’t interested in anything long-term or exclusive. After six weeks, you’ll start to see the real person behind the idealized image you had of them in the beginning.
8. You’re transparent with each other. It’s normal to fudge the truth a little when you first start dating someone. You might exaggerate your responsibilities at work or pretend to play the guitar a little better than you do. You might use white lies to pretend you’re interested in their hobbies or say you’re busy when you’re actually just at home eating fast food in your bathrobe and don’t want them to see you without makeup yet. By six weeks, however, you should feel comfortable enough to be honest about your insecurities, appearance, and preferences.
9. Your schedules should be syncing. You should be making time for each other. You should feel that you’re both investing time and effort into the relationship to decide if it’s a good fit. If your partner is always busy when you suggest a date and only available when it’s convenient for them, you should be realistic with yourself. If they’re like this now, what makes you think they’d change in the future?
10. You may be losing self-awareness. You might be lulling yourself into a false sense of security by six weeks. You think you’ve been with the person long enough to know them and know that they’re good for you. In reality, however, the deeper your relationship gets, the harder it is for you to be objective. As you begin to fall in love, you also begin to ignore red flags. Your emotional attachment will eclipse your judgment, and if you don’t step up your effort to keep things in perspective, you might miss some key indications that your relationship isn’t as perfect as you think.

Early Signs That Your Relationship Won’t Last

1. You argue about the same things over and over. One of the major signs that you and your partner are incompatible is not being able to resolve your differences. Having one or two issues that you simply cannot agree or compromise upon indicates a fundamental difference between you. Working on conflict resolution is a good first step, but repeatedly arguing about the same thing this early in a relationship suggests that there are issues that are important enough to drive you apart.
2. You don’t feel a mutual level of investment. One-sided relationships are heartbreaking, especially when you get just enough attention from the other person to hold out hope that they’ll change. But if they’re making you do all the work and yet somehow seem to have all the control, you will not make it another six weeks unless you radically restructure the foundation of your relationship.
3. They don’t respect you. Another sign that your relationship may not last is your partner taking you for granted. This can take many forms. They might expect you to be available whenever it’s convenient for them but never respond when you want to spend time together. They might casually mention that they’re seeing other people without acknowledging that it might hurt you. Whatever the specifics, treating you as if your time and feelings are irrelevant is a major red flag, especially at such an early stage in the relationship. At six weeks, they should be doing everything they can to show you how special they think you are, not ignoring and diminishing you.