What To Talk About With Your Crush To Spark A Connection

You like someone a lot and you want to see if there’s something more between you before you take the leap in asking them out or expressing your romantic interest. How do you do it? Easy — you talk to them. If you’re stuck when it comes to what to talk about with your crush, here are some interesting topics that should get you started.

  1. Music Who doesn’t like music? If you’re someone who listens to a bit of everything and so are they, you and your crush can talk about this topic for hours. What’s the best concert they’ve ever been to? Who’s someone they always wished they got to see before their death? Would they ever go to or have they been to a festival? What is the best album of the 21st century? Seriously, this topic is a goldmine.
  2. What you like to do on dates Everyone has a different idea of what makes a great date, but talking to your crush about this is great because it gives you an idea of what you could plan if you were to go out properly together. Also, it gives you some insight as to whether you have the same ideas of what constitutes a great night out.
  3. Aliens and ghosts Yeah, it sounds weird, but that’s why it’s perfect. Does your crush believe in aliens and ghosts? Have they had any experiences with them or know anyone who has? Granted, this could be very make or break because you could just discover that your crush is a closet UFO lover but was just too nervous to talk about it. That would probably be a deal-breaker.
  4. Countries/cities you’re desperate to visit Everyone has those bucket list destinations they want to visit one day when they have time/money to do so, and sharing them is a great way to get the conversation going and potentially spark a real connection between the two of you. You might discover that you’re both desperate to go to Tokyo or to take the train across the Canadian Rockies or something. Who knows, you may even end up doing it together one day!
  5. Weird conspiracy theories you believe in or can’t get behind Does your crush secretly believe the moon landing was fake? Do you think that the government is using 5G to plant metal chips in everyone’s heads? Even the most logical, educated people have at least one weird belief that others might shake their heads at, so talk about them with your crush!
  6. Tattoos Do they have any? Do they want any? Do you? Body art is always a sexy topic to get onto, depending on where on your body your ink is/where you want it.
  7. What they do for fun Sounds boring but it’s still important to know. Are they into playing baseball after work? Do you like going rock climbing? Do they collect stamps? Your favorite pastimes could become things you end up doing together if you get together in the future, so make a mental note of this.
  8. Celebs they have a crush on We all have celebrity crushes that we can’t explain, so this is a really fun conversation to have with your crush. Do you have a weird thing for Eminem? Are they bizarrely attracted to Martha Stewart? Depending on how unconventional your choices or theirs are, you could get some real laughs out of this.
  9. Their most vivid childhood memory Don’t be afraid to get deep when you talk with your crush. Chatting about your favorite childhood memories can be a great bonding experience and will allow you to grow closer even when things are still pretty platonic.
  10. Whether they prefer cats or dogs The answer to this could end your crush before it really gets off the ground, admittedly, but you kinda need to know the answer, don’t you think?
  11. Their favorite book If they don’t read (or you don’t), you’ll probably want to skip this question. However, if you’re a pretty big bibliophile and would prefer to date someone who is as well, you might as well find out about their literary tastes now.
  12. Their dream job If they could be anything in the world without limitation, what would they be? What would you be? Sure, we’re all confined to the realities of needing to make a living to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table, but imagine if money wasn’t a problem and literally the world was your oyster. What would you take from it?
  13. Sports I’m not strictly talking about football or baseball here, unless of course you’re into them. Maybe you really like tennis or pool or swimming or whatever. Talk to your crush about what sports they like too and see if your interests overlap anywhere. It could give you something else to bond over.
Jennifer has been the managing editor of Bolde since its launch in 2014. Before that, she was the founding editor of HelloGiggles and also worked as an entertainment writer for Bustle and Digital Spy. Her work has been published in Bon Appetit, Decider, Vanity Fair, The New York TImes, and many more.