What Unconditional Love Really Means And How To Find It

When it comes to relationships, we’ve long been taught that the ultimate goal is finding the kind of love that’s unconditional and everlasting. However, the reality of that kind of connection with someone is very different than what we imagine. So what is unconditional love really and how do you secure such a special relationship? Read on to find out more.

  1. They’ll never judge you. This is the crux of unconditional love, without a doubt. No matter how “weird” you are or how many mistakes you make, they’ll never judge you for it. They understand that you’re human and you’re bound to screw up sometimes. Because of this, they always extend you grace and kindness instead of condemning you the way the rest of the world might.
  2. They’ll always validate your feelings even if they don’t understand them. No two people are alike, and there’s bound to come a time when you feel a particular way about a situation or do something that totally baffles/infuriates/upset your partner. However, instead of invalidating your feelings or telling you that they don’t make sense, they accept your emotions and encourage you to work through them. It’s really refreshing.
  3. They’ll call you out on your crap. Unconditional love doesn’t mean letting someone get away with bloody murder and doing nothing about it. In fact, it’s just the opposite. It means that they care about you enough to call you out on bad behavior and confront you when you’re doing something that’s inappropriate, offensive, or otherwise hurtful. This is one of the purest ways someone can love you, know that.
  4. They’ll always respect you enough to tell you the truth. Sometimes it’s so much easier to fudge the truth than it is to be honest, especially when you know that honesty is going to lead to an argument or some kind of unrest. However, someone who has unconditional love for you will be straight-up with you regardless because they know it’s the best way to illustrate how much they care for you.
  5. Their feelings don’t change just because you don’t do what they want/expect. Unconditional love means exactly what it says: their love for you doesn’t depend on you meeting certain conditions they’ve set. You don’t have to act a certain way, do a certain thing, or be a certain version of yourself in order to have their love. It’s just there.
  6. They’ll still care about you even if your relationship ends. Just because someone loves you unconditionally doesn’t mean they’re going to be with you forever. Sometimes things don’t work out, and that’s okay. However, it does mean that just because your relationship ends doesn’t mean their love for you will. That will be there forever, no matter what.

So how do you find unconditional love in your own life? There’s no one way. However, one of the best ways is to be choosy about who you get into relationships with and also to offer your partner the same thing in return. Find someone who accepts you, validates you, and truly cares about you for who you are. If you manage this, you’re well on your way to unconditional love.

Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia