There are many different metrics for relationships in the year 2022. This is because of a mixture of events. Between Covid, economic obscurity, long distance, and more crises than a Bush-era presidential campaign, there hasn’t been much time for dating. That said, certain things are universal and transcend time. Once you’ve been dating someone for two months, there are certain hallmarks you can always expect.
You talk more.
You should be, anyway. This is a sign that you’re getting more comfortable with your partner because you’re making that time. It doesn’t feel as scary talking to them, although you will be very aware that you have a lot to learn about them still. Lots of people have very different first two months together, depending on the terms upon which they got together. When you start to talk more, you’re committing that time and energy to your partner in more ways than one. It means that you can see yourself in their future more and know their boundaries. That allows you to meet their needs more, with less guesswork.
You figure out the physical side of things.
With any person or new partner, sex gets better over time. It’s like a fine wine in that respect. It comes from a result of knowing them more, figuring out a history of experimentation from what has and hasn’t worked before. This is a natural process and can be reassuring, even if your first time with someone is really good and positive. We all have room for growth, and making sex a safe space for exploration and familiarity ensures that you get better at meeting your partner’s needs. There will be less panic and shame involved and we can all work on unpacking our sexual hang-ups together.
You start telling people about them.
If you’re kind of reserved, or if you’ve been burned before, you might be reticent to tell people about your new relationship. Or, if you’re queer or closeted, telling people about your relationship status can be a more loaded proposition than others. It’s always your prerogative to reveal that information but after the two-month stage, you’ll know whether you want to or not. That’s an important message to know when you have more conversations with them.
You can make more adventurous plans.
Where, in the first few weeks of your relationship, you might have seen a fun TikTok, or a new restaurant idea and wanted to tell your crush but not felt able to, you will have got past that stage by now. You can tell them anything, and even if you’re still getting used to that, you can feel safer in the knowledge that you could tell them. You don’t have to feel like you’ve got everything figured out, but you know that you’re on that path. It also means that you don’t feel rushed because you have time.
You might still feel unsure about your relationship.
It’s okay to have doubts. Great, in fact. That means you have a chance to talk to your friends and family about it and soundboard some issues you might be experiencing, either individually, or together. Chances are, they will have experienced a similar thing over their dating lives. It helps us to feel less alone in uncertain times. You will also start to get more comfortable talking to your partner about these fears and questions that you have. It shows courage to ask those questions because that’s the only way to get answers.
You can figure out what you want.
This is the time to watch all the RomComs and realize they don’t really know anything. Yes, they’re fun to watch, but they tend to miss out on showing that really great comfort level of a relationship in favor of the glitz and drama. I get it, they have a certain runtime to meet and seats to fill. But it sets this unrealistic expectation that everyone knows what they want the first second that they meet someone, and that relationships are things borne of luck and destiny, not hard work and honesty. Sticky, awkward situations are the real cornerstone of a real relationship, not a Hollywood one. Don’t focus only on why your ex didn’t want you, focus on the now.
You’re probably ready to have “The Talk.”
You know the one I mean. Yes, it might make you feel like you’re 12 again, asking if you can call your crush their boyfriend, but it’s important to still have that conversation. You have to be able to talk to them about the embarrassing things and let your guard down. Then you realize it’s not embarrassing at all.
It’s time to on a mini-break.
It’s like Bridget Jones says, you have to go by the relationship standard of taking a mini-break with your partner to see how much fun you can have. As well as that, you want to check how compatible you are together. There are loads of other metrics, of course, but it’s worth noting that the fun milestones are just as valuable as the serious ones. This is right up there with the first fart, y’all.
You spend less time feeling super anxious.
Those first few weeks or even months of a relationship can be anxiety-inducing as hell because you don’t know where you stand with your partner. You don’t know if they’re on the same page as you, if it’s all going to go up in smoke, if you’re doing things right, etc. However, when you’ve been dating for two months, you start to calm down just a little bit and start to feel a bit more relaxed with the other person. It’s a relief.
You really get to know them.
You’ll have learned all the preliminary stuff on your early dates, but now that you’ve been dating for a bit longer, you start to get to know the good stuff about them, all the stuff that’s under the surface and not polished over to make a good impression. This is where the real long-term compatibility is determined and it’s actually really exciting.
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