Dudes are fun and all, but nobody has your back like your best friend. When you have news, whether it’s as big as being asked out on a date or as mundane as buying a new house plant, your BFF is the first person you text. She’s practically an extension of yourself. People always say it’s like you’re dating and sometimes strangers just assume you’re a couple… and honestly, sometimes your BFF really is like the best possible version of a boyfriend.
You’re a package deal. Kinda like those couples on Facebook who have a shared account, people never say her name without yours or vice versa. If someone invites either one of you to a party, they expect to see both of you. If someone’s looking for you, the first person they call is your BFF. She’s the Thelma to your Louise, the Ilana to your Abbi, the Selena to your Taylor… sometimes your other friends joke that you should just get married. And you’ve definitely considered it.
You know her passwords to, like, everything. Facebook, Instagram, her iPhone lock screen… Because you and your BFF are basically one person, you go into each other’s crap all the time for some reason or another. Sometimes it’s for lurking on your ex who’s blocked you on every social media outlet. Look, it’s just more proof that he wasn’t your real soulmate. If he was really “The One,” he would’ve known to block her too!
You see each other at your fugliest. Toilet selfies, double chin selfies, sweaty red faced gym selfies, you and your BFF love each other in your least attractive states. When all the rolls are on the table and the acne hasn’t yet been Photoshopped, you snap the selfie anyways because you know it’ll make her laugh. Now that’s real love. The more chins, the better.
No one boosts your ego quite like her. When you two get together and put on the ol’ hot girl disguise before a ladies’ night, there’s no one screaming “CHECK HER OUT” louder than your BFF. She’s just as excited as you were when that sexy trainer at the gym complimented your squatting form, and you pretty much died when she got hired for her dream job. You’re one another’s biggest cheerleaders and you compliment each other more than the majority of couples who are actually dating.
She knows exactly what you need to hear and when. “GIRL. Let’s talk about your eyebrows. YOUR ARCH IS PERFECT.” Only a BFF knows you spent 25 minutes carefully tweezing, brushing and penciling those babies into submission, and she’s not about to let you walk away without feeling like the queen that you are.
You take each other on dates all the time. You rarely split the bill. Whoever made the most tips that week grabs the check. You guys keep a mental tab (it’s a little all over the place, but it always evens out) and you treat one another whenever you can. You both know there’s no point in celebrating your promotion with bottomless margaritas if she’s not by your side! When you win, she wins and vice versa.
You always take her side and she always takes yours. You know you’re an unstoppable force together. Even though you fight like an old married couple, when she needs you to back her up in an argument, you’re ready to step in like the feisty pitbull BFF you are. You know she’d do the same for you, no matter what. You know you can tell her about even your darkest moments and she’ll totally get why you had to throw an office chair at your coworker while screaming, “DON’T TOUCH MY YOGURT, SUSAN! I LABELED THAT CRAP AND YOU KNOW THAT.” You were hangry…s he gets it. No judgment between two people is pretty much as close to soulmates as it gets.
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