One minute a guy is going on and on about his feelings for you and texting every day and the next minute he’s all silent for weeks. He makes plans with you and then stands you up, then calls days later acting as if nothing happened. When you complain about his behavior, he’ll act all understanding and promise to change, but won’t make an effort until you try to move on. You’re probably sick and tired of men playing these silly mind games. So why do they do it?
- They don’t know how to connect with women in healthy ways. Maybe he grew up with a misogynistic, dead beat father who raised him to see women as objects. Maybe he once loved a woman who hurt him really badly and he’s never been the same since. His actions are driven by suspicion, fear, and insensitivity and it’s going to take lots of therapy and work to help him get past this behavior.
- They’re immature, insecure, and manipulative. Some guys have low self-esteem and are emotionally underdeveloped. So they pretend to be the perfect guy because they think if they play the part long enough, they’ll become it. He’ll try to make you feel unimportant or make you chase him to fuel his ego. If he can get you to dance to his tune, then he won’t feel like such a loser.
- They just want to get in your pants. It’s 2020, you’d think men would be mature about only wanting sex from a woman rather than lying and playing games to get what they want. They know that if they come clean about their intentions you might not give them the light of day, especially when you’ve made it clear from the beginning that you’re looking for a serious relationship.
- They don’t want to come off as too eager. Maybe he likes you, but he’s afraid of showing it in case the feeling isn’t reciprocated. So instead of opening up to you or doing things that show he cares for you, he’ll take the stupid route and choose to fuck with your mind, or even worse—ghost on you. He thinks that being mean or treating you like an option will prevent him from looking like a fool in love.
- They want to hold power over you. Sometimes, guys play mind games to manipulate you into behaving in a particular way. It’s all about control for them so whenever you do something they don’t like, they’ll start acting weird to punish and push you to do what they want. He doesn’t really care about you, he just wants to prove that he’s the alpha. He wants to be in charge, the one who calls all the shots in the relationship.
- They have commitment issues. Does he try to get closer to you on some days and acts like you don’t exist on other days? It could be because he has problems with commitment. He wants you, but he’s terrified that letting you in fully will end with him getting hurt. So he acts uninterested to prove to himself that can live without you.
- They like the challenge. Some guys love the chase more than they like you. They just want to see if they can get you to fall for them and they don’t really care if you get hurt in the process. They just want the rush of knowing that they have at least one woman waiting to hear from them. They’ll keep you around as long as it feeds their ego, and they’ll move on to the next conquest once they get bored of you.
- They’re dissatisfied with their own lives. There are men who feel like they have no control over things that happen in their lives. But rather than work to change that, they play games with women to fill that hole. By making you feel guilty or constantly worried about where you stand in his life, he can take back some control and feel better about himself.
- They think the mystery makes them more attractive. He might be playing mind games because he thinks that’ll make you want him more. He thinks that by acting indifferent or ignoring you, he can get you to fall even harder for him. A little mystery can be intriguing in the beginning, But if he keeps doing his best to appear mysterious after you’ve been going out for a while, best believe he’s only there to mess with your head.