Why Is It So Hard To Find A Relationship?

You’re a woman who knows what you want, and in terms of romance, what you want for the long-term is this: a loving, loyal man who will adore you, marry you, raise a family with you, and hold hands with you on the front porch when you’re both old and frail.

Wait a second. Isn’t a traditional, monogamous relationship supposed to be the default? How did it come to pass that you became the odd one out for wanting what was once the norm? Here’s why you’re looking for your boring, plain-old happily ever after:

  1. You’d rather figure out how to be an adult together instead of independently. These days, people talk about figuring out adulthood before you pair off with someone. But wouldn’t it be nice to figure it out with a partner? If you do, you’ll be able to climb over hurdles together that will give you a strong bond and a solid footing as you continue forward. You’ll grow closer together when you figure out what you want out of life together, not separately.
  2. You want to be with someone who really has your best interests at heart. A relationship that’s “just for now” may be appealing to some, but you know that in that kind of arrangement, everyone is only looking out for themselves. A deeper, more permanent commitment means that your partner will be looking out for you. 
  3. You want to have someone to do nice things for that can truly appreciate them. You want to leave little love notes all around the house or make your partner’s day by making them breakfast in bed. If you’re in a traditional relationship, that’s awesome. If you’re not, it’s just weird and a little stalker-ish.
  4. You want someone to really understand every last thing about you. You’re tired of feeling like you always have to put on a happy face for dates and parties. You want a long-term partner to know you and love you in good times and in bad.
  5. You want someone that you know you can depend on for anything. Have you ever had a problem and just sadly scrolled through your phone wondering who you can ask to help you out? Your partner is your built-in support network.
  6. You have absolutely zero interest in one-night stands or flings. Frankly, you just don’t see the appeal in hooking up with someone that you don’t have any deeper connection with. You’ll only feel crappy about it later on, and you’d probably have a better time staying in with your roommate and ordering a pizza than going out to the club trying to pick up guys.
  7. You have someone that will be a sounding board for life advice and will always be completely honest. A true partner will always give it to you straight.
  8. You want to have a family of your own. And biology is a bitch. Tick, tick, tick, tick.
  9. You want to be one of those adorable old couples holding hands on their front porch. I mean, let’s be honest. Who doesn’t actually want that? *Sigh*
Jessica Levy is a freelance blogger and content writer. She’s also a politics junkie, a fledgling foodie, and a frequent traveler. She has lived in Morocco, Israel, India, and Barbados, and never wants to be cold again. Follow her on Twitter!