So many people struggle through relationships thinking that tough times are just the name of the game. Yes, there will be ups and downs with being a new couple, but that shouldn’t be something that traps you in a relationship. Here’s why taking breaks in a relationship is actually healthier and just may prolong your relationship.
- You can build better communication alone. Yes, communication is the most important thing in a relationship, but sometimes we get caught in certain habits that are difficult to unlearn. Or, in a relationship, you find yourself not feeling able to say certain things. That can be really unhelpful when you’re trying to grow in yourself. By taking a break, you can reassess those skills independently and ensure that you can be the best version of yourself with your crush.
- You’re Showing intent. By being willing to look your regrets and flaws in the eye and commit to addressing them, that’s showing maturity. It means that you aren’t trying to ignore the problems in a relationship just for the sake of doing so. If you’re counting the days in your relationship by trying to prove to yourself you’re in love, you’re doing it wrong. When you go on a break even though you love the person, you’re making a statement. By committing to coming back fresh and better, you’re being so much more productive than just arguing constantly and assuming things will get better on their own.
- You can address issues. Not only just with the relationship but independently. People don’t realize that those are two separate things. The problems that you struggle with personally do spill into a relationship, but there are so many separate considerations that get buried in a relationship. It means that you will find that you stop developing as a person. You just start habits together or get friends together. The only thing is, you stagnate by doing that! By addressing issues such as codependency and boredom, you can figure out how to sustain your own life on your own terms.
- You’re more likely to resolve the issues. This is to your personal benefit and to the people in your relationships. You cannot be reduced to the way you serve other people. It’s not a mentality to feed into that you shouldn’t be the first on your list of priorities. That’s so not the point of being in a loving relationship. Sometimes, it can be hard to see that. All the more value in taking that break to reassess. It’s the mature thing to do.
- You develop a solid foundation. These issues might have arisen because you rushed into a relationship in the first place. However, by taking a break and picking up new hobbies, seeing a therapist, and traveling to new places, you understand the world more. Your partner should never be your world. Ever. By coming together (that’s what she said) later on, you are both mature. You will also have questions and new perspectives to bring to both the development of the relationship, but also in its definition.
- You can grow separately. This is what distinguishes a young relationship from a mature one. When you’re young, like teenagers, you’re both so insecure and new to dating that you accept and crave validation without considering your other needs in a relationship. In fact, unless you take that break it can take years for someone in a relationship to notice all that they’re missing out on. You might not even know, or be able to put a finger on what feels off. That’s where a break comes in.
- You become more independent. Maybe your partner didn’t like to travel. Or, maybe you never found the time or the same holiday to plan nice things. Sometimes, when you’re together with someone you think you have to be adults the whole time and just having a fun, reckless time seems wasteful. By taking a break, you get to explore those options without thinking ‘what if’. If you find your way back to each other, then it means something. You aren’t just a relationship of convenience, or only together because it’s what was easy.
- You foster less resentment. By experiencing the hard emotions and going through that difficult period, you prepare yourself. You’re strong and resilient and you won’t shy away from conflict. It means you will get the answers you want, and you won’t mope for a week before finally communicating what’s wrong. Then you don’t need to blame one another and can take responsibility for your behavior. That’s real growth there, folks.
So there you have it, a few reasons why taking a break could be the key to a successful relationship in the modern world. Don’t knock it ’til you try it!
