So you’re in a pretty good relationship with someone right now and you’re thinking that maybe, just maybe, this person might be THE ONE. But how can you tell if you’re just enamored by the newness of it all or if this really is the person that’s going to stand the test of time and be the one you share a can of Ensure with while you watch Friends reruns together? Chances are, if you meet the following criteria, you might be in it for the long haul.
You like hanging out with each other. In the beginning of the relationship, you can’t wait to be on him all day and all night. But pretty soon, the urgency starts to fizzle out, certain areas get a little sore, and when the sex fog clears, you’re left to deal with the person you chose. After the honeymoon surge subsides and and you find that you still want to hang out with each other simply because you enjoy each other’s company, then your relationship is on track to being pretty awesome.
You both know how to agree to disagree. No one likes to get into arguments, but they’re inevitable. You either learn from them or let stupid little fights over the remote escalate into an all-out verbal assault. A relationship that’s ready for the long haul is a relationship where you realize that there’s just some things not worth fighting about, and you both learn to walk away from it without having to declaring a winner.
You can (and do) apologize when you’re at fault. Couples that survive the test of time not only know how to argue, but they can also take responsibility for their actions and say sorry if they need to. If you or your significant other are too proud to admit when you’re wrong and find it hard to apologize, then you might as well call it quits and work on yourselves before getting into another relationship.
You’re on the same page about the big things. It’s a rare that a relationship can go the distance when you don’t agree about the major things in life such as religion, politics, children/child rearing and money. If your vision of the future and life coincides with your partner’s vision, you’ll avoid future conflicts that can lead to huge arguments that over time, slowly corrodes your relationship.
You put their needs before your own, and vice versa. Research shows that highly successful couples have one thing in common: they’re a lot more selfless than the average person. When couples adhere to the 60/40 rule when it comes to their significant other (you give them 60%, they give you 40% and the same rule applies to him), both of you will feel cared for and truly loved by the other person, which creates a stronger bond.
You laugh a lot. Laughing is just one of those things that’s an effortless way to create a connection with someone, especially with someone you love. Making each other laugh, having your own personal inside jokes and just being goofballs together makes things fun, fresh, and is definitely an important factor in a long-lasting relationship.
You take pride in each other. Happy couples that have withstood the test of time genuinely admire one another and take pride in who their partner is as a person. If you speak of your significant other in a positive light and you’re genuinely proud to be with him (and vice versa) it not only reminds you of why you chose to be with him, but it also makes him feel special, which reminds him of why he’s with you. It’s a love cycle that goes on forever. Love thrives when there’s genuine awe and respect for one another (and feeling like you totally scored someone who might have been out of your league is a great thing!).
You’re romantic every day. We’re not talking about flowers or typical over-the-top romantic gestures everyday. Romance can be something as insignificant, like grabbing a Reeses’ Peanut Butter Egg for your boyfriend when you get gas because you know he can’t shove enough of those in his mouth come Easter time. A quick kiss on the cheek for absolutely nothing, a butt grab whenever he bends over, texting him a dirty joke in the morning to start his day off with a laugh. If your relationship was a car, these are the mini tune-ups that keep the motor running for a long, long time.
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