This Woman Eloped With Her Chandelier—No, Seriously

It sounds so stupid and so far out that a woman would marry an inanimate object. It happened, though, and the story is very real. First reported by The Sun, Amanda Liberty got engaged to a chandelier that she purchased. She named this object Lumiere. You can draw your own conclusions about this story, but here are some of the facts.

1. Imagine you’ve had one too many crappy dates. You’ve gone on an endless stream of dates with people you met online and otherwise. They’re one disaster after another. You keep trying to date men, women, everything in between but nothing is working out, so you end up giving up. You’ve had enough. One way to go next would be to start to date inanimate objects. Yanno, rather than being single or alone.
2. Amanda Liberty got engaged to a lamp. When Amanda saw Lumiere on eBay, she said that she was the one. It was love at first sight. So, she bought her and got her shipped to the UK from Germany. Then, she proposed on Valentine’s Day and even gave a diamond ring. Yup, you heard correctly, a diamond. There’s a 57-year age gap between the two, but apparently, that doesn’t bother Amanda. She’s ready to be hooked.
3. She’s an objectum sexual. Amanda’s someone who’s attracted to inanimate objects. This means that things other than her chandeliers may also catch her eye. In fact, her first relationship with an inanimate object was when she was 14. It was with a drum kit. Amanda said, “People often can’t understand that this is just a natural orientation for me, that I can find the beauty in objects and can sense their energy.”
4. She says all objects have energy. One of her explanations for why she’s so crazy about inanimate objects is that each object has energy. She says she can feel the energy and can decipher who’s a good chandelier (or drum kit, or whatever).
5. She also claims to be in an open relationship. Amanda Liberty also owns 24 other chandeliers, claiming that she was in an open relationship even before meeting Lumiere. She says that they’re still in an open relationship, but Lumiere is her number one. Open relationships are traditionally about love, honesty, and communication, but I guess the rules are switched up when the other parties are inanimate objects.
6. Amanda explains that the arrangement works perfectly. She actually said, “None of my chandeliers are jealous of each other, they understand that I love them all for all of their different personalities. For example, I love kissing and cuddling Lumiere, but I sleep with Jewel every night, as she’s portable and very nice to cuddle.” The inanimate object life seems to be the best life for Amanda.
7. They’re actually having a commitment ceremony. It wasn’t enough to give the engagement ring, Amanda actually wants to go ahead and have a ceremony. She says this is her first time being engaged, so she’s excited. Who knows how much money she’s going to spend on the ceremony and how many people are going to attend. Perhaps it’ll be as traditional a wedding as it possibly can be.
8. The lamp is named after the character in Beauty and the Beast. Amanda said, “A friend of mine actually named her Lumiere because of the film ‘Beauty and The Beast,’ after the candlestick who comes alive.” All the more power to her. Lumiere is a pretty awesome character. According to the Disney Wikipedia website, “Lumiere is a suave, vivacious gentleman and as any gracious host would, treats Belle with warmth and to a spectacular show-stopping number.”
9. It seems by all accounts she’s dead serious. You probably read the title of this article and thought “You’ve got to be kidding me. This has to be a joke.” But, it honestly seems by all accounts that this is Amanda Liberty’s life. I mean she even was in a relationship with Lady Liberty at one point and to show her dedication she changed her last name. This woman is truly an objectum sexual.
10. She says she still loves Liberty, or “Libby.”Amanda lives over in the UK but has traveled over to the US six times just to see the Statue of Liberty. She claimed to struggle with the long distance relationship, finding solace in her chandeliers. Her living room is absolutely covered with memorabilia because she claims she still loves Libby.
11. I mean, dating humans can really suck sometimes. Moral of the story is sure, this is really freaking far out. Like, it’s mind-boggling it’s so silly. Though, reflecting on dating humans one can quickly remember that they’re not so easy to date. In fact, it can really suck to date humans. We sometimes lie, cheat, hurt, manipulate, and the list goes on. They’re pretty imperfect. I guess, she’s not that crazy to choose inanimate objects.