13 Women Reveal The Ways Guys Have Ruined Their Chances Of A Relationship

Guys have shared some of their worst experiences with women that made them certain a relationship wasn’t in the cards, but what about some of women’s more awkward, unbelievable, or occasionally traumatic experience with the guys they’ve been seeing? The ladies of Reddit came together to share some of those experiences and some of them are intense.

  1. He was an undercover abuser. User ArmchairSlacktivism recalled a scary run-in with a guy she’d just met, writing, “He was wearing a cast on his leg, said he got beat up. Ohno that’s awful, poor guy. Well it turns out his son beat him up after witnessing him abuse his ex-wife one too many times. This story was told to me like he was the victim. I was already feeling uncomfortable by this point because of other creepy shit he said. He told me he was going to follow me home. I told him I had to go to the bathroom and got up and walked right out the door. I am on the road and my phone is going off, he is calling me repeatedly. I figure the decent thing to do is let him down gently. Plus I’m a little afraid of him by his point. I answer and tell him I left because I got sick. He says “Look in your rearview mirror I’m following you home!” I very firmly told him to stop. Of course he continues to follow me. I drove to the police station instead of going home. There were some officers outside thankfully and that scared him off.” Yikes!
  2. He couldn’t balance partying and parenthood. In an equally concerning experience, canttouchthis05 recalled, “On our first ‘date,’ he picked me up with his baby in the backseat and an open beer in the cupholder.” Who does that?!
  3. He acted like she wasn’t even on the date. “Met a guy at a wing restaurant after I got off work. The majority of the time we were there, he talked about his ex-wife,” user only1Leah wrote. “After he finished eating, he asked if I wanted to get frozen custard or see a movie. I told him I’d rather watch a movie (dietary restrictions) and, since I didn’t know the area well, I’d follow him to the theater in my own car. Instead of driving to the theater, he drove to the custard place. He didn’t even mention the movie again. Just ordered himself a big custard.” Why are guys so weird?!
  4. He joked about murdering her. Yes, this seriously happened—talk about a red flag! Chellis8210 wrote, “He told me he was really strong and if he wanted to, could probably beat me to death pretty easily, but never would because he wouldn’t hit a girl, because he’s a nice guy.”
  5. He only talked about himself. How awkward is it when you’re on a date but the other person isn’t interested in you at all? Velvetchablis remembered, “He talked so much about himself I barely got any time to say anything, so it ended up with me just saying ‘oh, yeah, uh-uh, cool’ and him not asking a single question about me. That guy really just took himself out on a date.”
  6. He wanted her to be someone she wasn’t. In one of the stranger encounters, theartistbynight revealed, “I went out once with someone who brought a pair of glasses to our first date and asked if I would wear them the entirety of our relationship. He already knew I didn’t wear glasses so he had gone ahead and put in fake lenses for me. When I asked why, he said it was because he always imagined himself marrying someone who wore glasses. Also, he told me that he found those glasses on the floor at the movie theatre. Lucky me!”
  7. He was cruel to animals. User Rapscallionrodent was horrified when she went out with a guy who attacked a pigeon. “We were acquainted with each other through work and it was the first date. We’re in a park, walking along, talking – everything’s normal up until then. Suddenly, one of the many pigeons walking around the fountain wandered near us. The guy stops what he’s saying mid-sentence, and takes a running kick at the pigeon. The pigeon’s too fast for him and takes off, landing just a couple of feet away. The guy takes it personally and goes running after the pigeon, again, repeatedly trying to kick it. Finally, the pigeon ends the stand off by flying up to a tree. The guy takes off his shoe and throws it at the pigeon who’s now feeling confident in his tree. The shoe misses. So the guy picks up his shoe, puts it back on, and starts walking back to me, sulking and swearing under his breath as he half heartedly kicks at any pigeon near him. All of this happened in a matter of minutes. When he first kicked at the pigeon, I said something like, ‘Leave him alone. What are you doing?’ But after the full-on pigeon brawl, I was just in shock. When he came back to me, he was panting, wiping sweat from his forehead, but acted like nothing had happened. He started talking about where we should have lunch. I finally said, What the f*** was that?'” His explanation? He just “doesn’t like pigeons.”
  8. He just wasn’t a nice person. “He thought that being witty requires making fun of every person in his life,” shared hopebirmingham. I think we’ve all known an insecure guy like that in our lives.
  9. He used a fake accent. In one of the more baffling experiences, crystalhalo remembered, “This guy literally spoke on the phone for ages while faking an Irish accent; I met up with him at a gig and he spoke in an Irish accent the whole time. I genuinely believed he was Irish up until a friend of his told me he was putting it on the whole time. This was in England, but just… Why?”
  10. He insulted her weight. Localblackandred shared her experience with a particularly common type of a-hole, writing, “A boyfriend of a few days told me I should start gymnastics again after telling him I used to. I asked why and he responded with, ‘It’d help you lose weight.’ I was 110 pounds.”
  11. He was a racist. “He made several racist comments about his co-workers. I called him out. He said he couldn’t be racist because he’s a feminist who loves women,” theotherdarrin wrote. “Another complained about Vietnamese restaurants hiring Vietnamese people and how it ruined the atmosphere to hear them ‘exist.'”
  12. He ghosted her then zombied her. User zazzlekdazzle dealt with an obnoxious but common scenario, sharing, “Ghosting me and then turning-up again weeks later to see if I was still interested – when he was clearly just using that time to follow-up with someone he liked more than me, but then he got dumped. I don’t think every relationship requires an explicit break-up. If we’ve only been out a few times and you’re not interested, not getting back to me gets the message across loud and clear. But keep in mind, doing it that way can burn the bridge.”
  13. He expected sex on tap. “Told me that if we became a couple (this was on the first date) that he expected sex whenever he wanted. I explained that I wasn’t about to do that, and was countered with ‘well if I’m your boyfriend I deserve it!'” wrote greffedufois. Looks like she dodged a bullet there!
Piper Ryan is a NYC-based writer and matchmaker who works to bring millennials who are sick of dating apps and the bar scene together in an organic and efficient way. To date, she's paired up more than 120 couples, many of whom have gone on to get married. Her work has been highlighted in The New York Times, Time Out New York, The Cut, and many more.

In addition to runnnig her own business, Piper is passionate about charity work, advocating for vulnerable women and children in her local area and across the country. She is currently working on her first book, a non-fiction collection of stories focusing on female empowerment.