Would You Date You? Questions To Ask Yourself Before Getting Involved

Would you date you? This is an important question to ask yourself when you’re single because if you don’t want to take yourself out to dinner, then go back to your place and have sex with yourself, why would anyone else want to?! So before you go getting into another relationship, close down Tinder App for a minute, take a look in the mirror and ask yourself: Are you the kind of person you’d swipe right on?

  1. Do you make an effort? When you go out to the bars or go out on a date, do you make an overall effort to be a contributing part of the date or do you wait for him to start the conversation and work hard to try and impress you? This kind of selfish crap makes you look judgey, pretentious and so not cute. You definitely don’t want to date that person, so do a little self assessment and make sure you’re not turning your dates into a casting call to fill the role of your next boyfriend.
  2. Are you pleasing to the senses? Looking nice is always a good thing.  I don’t mean that in a superficial, “I only wear brand names and starve myself so you can look like a supermodel” kind of way. Do you brush your teeth and comb your hair before going out in public? Do you take pride in presenting yourself well? As much as we want to live in a world where everyone is judged by who they are on the inside instead of how they look, the reality is, you can put off even the most enlightened person when your breath smells like old onions. A little self-care goes a long way in making your best self shine.
  3. Are you confident? You don’t always have to be confident, but you should try and feel good about yourself most of the time. After all, a self-assured woman is a lot more fun to hang out with than, say, one who’s constantly downgrading every compliment she gets and bemoaning the fact that she doesn’t have a thigh gap. Make up your mind about who you are and why you’re great. Self-confidence leaves no wiggle room for needy hobbies like fishing for compliments on Instagram by posting a picture of your dog that’s really just a picture of mostly your boobs.
  4. Are you a nice person? If you haven’t already noticed, finding someone nice is hard to come by nowadays, which is weird because everyone likes a nice person. So why aren’t there tons of nice people walking around? If you’re bucking the trend and choose to be nice to others, even when some people don’t return the favor,  you’ll be happy to know that your affability makes you one hot commodity.  No one wants to date (or even be around) a bitch, so don’t be one.
  5. Are you a good listener? Listening is different from simply hearing, which is an automatic thing that takes no effort. What does take effort is to actually listen – as in paying attention and absorbing what someone is saying. How many times have you actually taken in what someone was telling you versus just waiting for him to finish so you can start talking again? If the latter sounds familiar, don’t worry – a majority of us have done it at one time or another because people, as a whole, are pretty self-absorbed. But if you can master the art of being a good listener, you’ll be a better catch than you already are.
  6. Are you straightforward? Nothing is worse than a woman who’s passive-aggressive when it comes to expressing her needs and desires. It forces the people around you to have to work to figure out what you’re really saying.  It’s exhausting talking to someone that makes every conversation a chore – not to mention, it leaves things open to misunderstandings, which leads to unnecessary fights. So make it easy on yourself and your future boyfriend. Be straightforward, say what you need to say and save the guessing games.
  7.  Are you self-aware? You know yourself inside and out, and you definitely acknowledge both your strengths and your flaws. When you’re being a bitch, you know it, you own it and you apologize for it if necessary.  Trying to be a better person when you don’t have self-awareness is like trying to fix a car without opening up the hood.  It’s just not going to happen. Be on top of our own behavior and you can’t go wrong.
Elaine is a freelance writer who has written for Playboy and used to blog nonstop before she got a Facebook, Twitter, & Instagram and lost all focus. She loves mangoritas, talking in the third person and when you share her articles with your friends. Follow her on Twitter @Ladyhaha, or go to Shedens.com and read more of her ridiculousness.
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