For many people, including alcohol in dating is a normal practice, especially during the first few awkward dates. Generally, as those first few dates turns into many dates, or a full blown relationship, the inclusion of alcohol becomes less frequent or reduces in quantity. If you find yourself at this stage and all your dates still involve getting drunk, it’s normal to question why this is going on. Here are some telltale signs that your relationship would fall apart without alcohol:
All dates include drinking.
If every date you have includes drinking, no matter the time of day, this is a huge red flag that something is wrong with your relationship. Now’s the time to examine your relationship to see if you’re filling a void with liquor or if there are underlying substance abuse issues. If you or your partner is an alcoholic, it would be difficult to move forward together without recognizing this first.
Drunk sex is your best sex.
Drunk sex can be really hot and fun, but if it’s the only kind of sex you are enjoying with your partner, your relationship would likely fall apart without alcohol. It’s not healthy or sustainable to get drunk every time you want to have an orgasm, and this may be a sign of underlying intimacy issues.
You drink to cope with your emotions.
If you literally cannot even deal with feelings without a few drinks, you will end up abusing alcohol a lot throughout the course of a relationship. A long term relationship comes with a vast variety of emotions, so if you are drinking to numb them early on then your relationship is likely doomed.
You don’t have any other mutual hobbies.
While it is healthy to have separate hobbies that you do individually, if there is absolutely no other overlap in your interests then you will find yourselves drinking more often than your should or want to. If you can’t find anything else you enjoy doing together, it may be time to date other people.
You don’t have serious discussions sober.
Including alcohol in all your serious discussions is a recipe for disaster. You will most likely end up fighting, saying things you don’t mean, or avoiding resolution. If you do not feel safe or comfortable dealing with your issues sober, your relationship will eventually fall apart.
Your sober conversations feel dull or awkward.
A lull in a conversation shouldn’t feel uncomfortable with your partner. If you’re feeling pressure to drink in order to make the conversation more exciting or interesting, you a probably covering up a serious issue: a lack of a real connection.
You pre-game for dates.
Always pre gaming for dates with your honey is a sign that you are using alcohol as a crutch in your relationship. Examine why you need to drink before you see your SOS. Are you not uncomfortable? Not feeling connected? Afraid of your feelings? There’s definitely something going on here that shouldn’t be ignored. Be proactive to not waste time on a relationship that’s dependent on alcohol.
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