Reminder: You Deserve Love, No Matter How Flawed You May Be

When you’ve been dealt too many blows in the dating world, it’s easy to start believing that the problem is you. We sometimes believe things never work out because we’re just not worthy of love, but that’s BS. Here’s why you deserve love, no matter how flawed you may be:

  1. Everyone is flawed. There’s not a single person in the world who doesn’t have some substantial quirks, if not outright flaws, so that sort of throws out the whole theory that you could be unlovable because of yours.
  2. Love heals. It might not fix your aching lower back, but does letting love seep into your life change heal you in many ways? Yes, it does. Have you ever seen anyone less happy after getting a puppy? No, because, such unconditional love boosts your spirit.
  3. There’s someone for everyone. Probably, right? There’s a person (or maybe multiple people) out there who could make your life better if he were in it. If you haven’t met him yet, assume that you will, and know that he’ll not only embrace your flaws, but love you because of them rather than in spite of them.
  4. You wouldn’t turn away love because a guy was flawed. We’re talking about the right guy, of course — you’ll turn away the wrong guys for all kinds of reasons. If flaws are hard for you to accept, even in people you care about, maybe you’re just not ready for a relationship. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it would certainly explain any feelings of being unlovable.
  5. You’re a gift. We’re all so different in this world because our uniqueness makes us necessary. The world needs you, and there are people who will need you, too. That’s just how it works.
  6. You have love to give. People who don’t have love to give can still be loved, but if you do have love to give, it’s pretty much a given that someone will take it and reciprocate it at some point.
  7. When you want things, you generally get them. It might take time, or it might come in a different package, but generally if you set your mind to something, you can figure out a way how to make space for it in your life.
  8. You love yourself. Even on your crappiest days, you probably wouldn’t actually trade your life. Maybe you’re inspired by other people’s awesomeness, but at the end of the day, you want to cultivate that for you, not start over in a different life and have it handed to you. That’s because you love yourself, and if you do, than guys will.
  9. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. OK, obviously you’re not trash and never have been, but you get the idea. What you consider a flaw might be the main thing that someone loves about you, so whatever. Let’s not overthink things too much and stop deciding for other people how they should feel about us.
Kate Ferguson is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blog and magazine genres. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce. Look for article links, updates, (and the occasional joke) on Twitter @KateFerg or @WriterKateFerg, or check out her personal blog