Why You’re More Like The “Cool Girl” Than You Think

If you’re anything like me, you grew up watching/obsessing over the idea of being the “cool girl” and wishing desperately that you would grow up to be her. Guess what? You may not think so, but you actually have. Here’s why you’re more like the cool girl than you think:

  1. You don’t care what others think. This is basically the definition of coolness. It’s the skip in your step when you’re walking around your city or town. It’s your willingness to go after what you want, even if you don’t succeed the first (or 100th time). It’s the way you laugh off drama and any rumors flying around in your friend group (so junior high). In other words, you’re totally confident.
  2. You don’t have to shout to be heard. There’s nothing lamer than someone who thinks being super loud and aggressive is the only way to get your point across. If you know that’s not the case and that having a quiet confidence is way better, then you’re already cool.
  3. You don’t sweat the small stuff. There’s a reason people are often described as being cool, calm and collected. You can’t possibly be a cool girl if you’re freaking out over a rescheduled dinner date with your BFF or overanalyzing every text from the new guy in your life. You know that every problem can eventually get solved and that there’s no reason driving yourself crazy over things you can’t control or change.
  4. You choose moments over material things. Sure, celebs seem cool when they Instagram every lavish beach vacation they go on and when they wear design clothes every day of their lives. But you don’t have to be super materialistic in order to be cool. You know that sharing a laugh with your best friends on a random Tuesday evening is what really matters, and you actually appreciate the moments as you live them.
  5. You know the difference between goals and plans. We all have dreams and if we want to actually put those dreams into motion, we come up with some goals. If we’re big dreamers, our goals most likely don’t change or we’d stay in the same place forever. But plans do change. So if you expect your plans to shift and get cancelled, but keep your goals close to your chest, that’s pretty cool.
  6. You’re not defined by your single status. If you’re unhappy with the fact that you’re unattached right now, then you’ll never be happy, even when you find love. That’s because there’s a difference between wanting the right life partner to come around and being super desperate for just anyone. You’re cool with the path you’re on. No rush.
  7. You change your mind. It’s super lame to think that you can never change your mind about anything. You know that if you hate your job, you can start looking for something else (even if it’s only been a hot minute). If you’re unhappy with your relationship, you know it’s time to break-up. Cool girls always know it’s totally their prerogative if they change their mind about what they want.
  8. You don’t hold onto negativity. Whether toxic friends, evil bosses or bad boyfriends, you can say goodbye to anyone or anything that brings you more stress than smiles.
  9. You like yourself. I’m not saying you have to be super conceited – that’s probably not the best way to win over people – but you’re definitely in the cool category if you have some body confidence (and overall confidence, too).
  10. You’re a good person. I totally think that we should redefine the traditional definition of “the cool girl” as someone who is actually a kind human being. With every day that you’ve spent on this planet, you prove that you don’t need to be a jerk to attract attention from others. If you help others, even if it’s just by making someone smile, then congrats. You’re officially the cool girl. And you’re doing it your own way.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.