You’re Not “Talking To” Him, You’re Dating Him

You’re Not “Talking To” Him, You’re Dating Him ©iStock/svetikd

These days, we seem to really struggle with commitment and putting labels on a relationship. We don’t want to rock the boat or scare the other person away, so we keep it in this in between phase until the other person either chickens out or finally gives in. Labels or not, as much as you’d like to keep things casual, you’re not just “talking” to him, you’re dating him.

  1. You talk about him… A LOT.Let’s get real here — you can’t stop blabbering on about him. You try to keep your mouth shut, but somehow you always sneak him into the conversation with your friends. If you can’t stop talking about him, then you’re NOT just “talking” to him.
  2. You post pictures with him on social media. Every girl comes to a fork in the road when you feel it’s finally appropriate to post a picture of him/with him on social media for the entire world to see. Ladies, the minute that you post it, it’s out in the open at this point. He’s not just some random dude, he’s real.
  3. He’s met your friends. We all know that females don’t bring around a guy unless they really like him and/or really like him and want to know their friends’ opinion of him in order to decide whether or not they should continue “talking” to him. Sorry to break the news, but once you bring him around to your friends, you officially care about him.
  4. At least one of your family members know about him.Whichever family member it is that you dish out your gossip to, you’ve most likely dropped his name in passing. If they know about him then he’s kind of a big deal.
  5. He’s met at least one of your family members. Meeting the friends is just one small step, but meeting the family is officially crossing into relationship territory. Once your family has met him, then just wait for the interrogation round to come.
  6. You actually go on real dates. If you’re actually going out to dinner, going to the movies, and even double dating with friends, then guess what — YOU’RE DATING. This isn’t some kind of fling like “Netflix and chill.” Going on dates means that you are, in fact, dating. Don’t try to hide it any longer.
  7. He holds your hand in public. If he’s not ashamed to hold your hand, then he’s not ashamed to be with you. Hand-holding is a pretty intimate thing and the ultimate ‘couple alert’ sign.
  8. He kisses you in public. Whoa whoa whoa, PDA! If he’s not just holding your hand, but also kissing you in public, then this guy seriously likes you. What difference would giving it a label actually make?
  9. You’re not hooking up with anyone else.Sometimes, exclusivity doesn’t need to be asked for, it just happens. If you know he’s not hooking up with anyone else and you’re not hooking up with anyone else, then you guys are pretty much exclusive. And at this point, “the talk” should be a short one. When you know, you just know.
  10. Nor are you “talking” to anyone else.You no longer have a wandering eye. Your heart is set on the person you’re with and the same goes for them. If you know there’s no one else, then you guys are officially dating.
  11. It bothers you if he talks to another girl. If you didn’t truly care about him, then there would be no need for jealousy, but if you see some random girl comment on his Facebook and it really pushes your buttons, then you two aren’t just a casual fling.
  12. You legitimately WANT to be his girlfriend.Enough with the silly mind games and just face it – You WANT to be his girlfriend. And as much as you don’t want to rock the boat, just do it. If you can no longer push aside the feeling of not knowing what you guys are, then just say something. It would have happened eventually.
Lindsey is a Digital Advertising Professional and Freelance Writer based in New York City. In her spare time, she enjoys running, traveling, and drinking ridiculous amounts of coffee. Follow her on Twitter @lindseyruns